00;00;00;00 – 00;00;16;13
Unknown
All right, we got practice. We’re good, we’re good. Just had to start over. Sorry about that. Okay. Time.
00;00;16;15 – 00;00;38;27
Unknown
Hey, it’s me Aaron. Thanks for joining us on the Moor Love podcast. Do not tell Rebecca, but this podcast is about empathy. She likes people to think she’s dead inside. But the truth is, she’s a big time feeler who has truly helped me uncover that empathy is my superpower. Oh, here she comes. Hey, bestie. Hi, love. What are you doing?
00;00;38;28 – 00;01;03;09
Unknown
Oh, just getting ready to host a podcast. A podcast about what? Our life. Our life as best friends. Who are more like sisters. yay! I love that, and I can’t wait to share our stories of the world. especially the ones that involve us pushing each other right to be our most authentic selves. Oh, man. Okay. It’s cards, man.
00;01;03;09 – 00;01;21;26
Unknown
Okay. What a card you picked. Yeah. How many ounces? Based on our. Based on our conversation on the card before we go. Yeah. You mean the session we had before? Yeah. How many ounces? How many yards? 12. 12. But, you know, I only drink half of it. Six. So six. I got put in my points. Four points. It’s not bad.
00;01;21;29 – 00;01;41;18
Unknown
That’s not bad. But that plus my stack and bacon have my points. Reject or. Yeah. Actually, ex, can I ask you. Yeah. You can ask anything you want. What are you doing? Are you doing, like, Weight Watchers? Oh, yeah, I’m doing that. I mean, doing the. Oh, I mean, we can talk about those. Listen, Scott. So can I, yeah.
00;01;41;19 – 00;02;09;05
Unknown
Can I? Can I be your health coach? Oh, absolutely. I mean, yeah, look at me. You want me yours? You you you have to try. I love like I love on plan because. No, but I only get 23 points a day. What you don’t know about me is this your lifetime? No. I, back in my in my 30s, I was in Uber great shape and was a a fiend about fitness and nutrition.
00;02;09;08 – 00;02;34;13
Unknown
Oh, and know everything there is to know. And then some. And what happened? Stop it, stop it. Well, well, because that is not look real good. Did not mean it. Like that’s what she did. No, I don’t mean I’m not in great shape and it doesn’t go through and then what? But listen. So what’s next? you’re such an ass.
00;02;34;14 – 00;02;58;14
Unknown
It’s all here. It’s all in your head. Oh, what? The whole. Everything about what you want to do with your. With weight and with eating and all that stuff. It’s all in your freaking head. No pressure. Sure, I could, like I couldn’t I self-medicated with food. Sure. Yeah. And beer and vodka. So I couldn’t give food up. So I had to give the other stuff.
00;02;58;17 – 00;03;33;22
Unknown
Yes and yes. For five years. Today, five years. Oh, congratulations. Five years sober for real. That’s I is a absolutely gigantic, huge accomplishment. Yeah. Don’t think we spend enough time acknowledging how much it takes to get your psyche in a place where you’re ready to quit a substance that has been causing you turmoil. I will say that, there’s a book called This Naked Mind by a woman named, Annie Grace.
00;03;33;22 – 00;03;54;22
Unknown
That really, really kind of changed my whole thought process on alcohol. I’m gonna write that down. It’s, I actually had her on my podcast. We don’t talk about other podcasts on this podcast. but there’s other. But there there are no what’s mine. Oh, and, headlines that you guys made. why isn’t he had us on his.
00;03;54;22 – 00;04;14;00
Unknown
Yeah. Why? He. Oh, I just I just started it back up. I haven’t done it. Oh, yeah. Shocking. Oh, so we weren’t the first. Okay. It’s fine. You’re on the list. Oh, God. Oh, God is great. He just added it right now. Yeah. We’re okay. Yeah, I just making milk. It’s like a little tiny, like, could it put it on there?
00;04;14;02 – 00;04;20;28
Unknown
Well, congratulations. That’s amazing. I crossed out the word shit list.
00;04;21;00 – 00;04;39;10
Unknown
You guys are number one. That’s right. That’s. Well, we do tend to call you. We’ve now resorted. We used to just call the three women that we just FaceTime. yeah, we we just say. So we got calls. Got so what? We’re going to see what we’re going to sell. I can’t do it live now. But what we’re going to see in the edit right now is, is the FaceTime video.
00;04;39;10 – 00;05;00;06
Unknown
No audio because I’m guessing not smart enough to record audio. Oh automatically recorded but happened. But I have. When you guys FaceTimed me from that antique store, you recorded it? Yeah. The shop, the shops at West Westbridge. Oh, my God, I recorded that. Oh, yeah. I think we should talk about that. Yeah, let’s do it. Let’s do it.
00;05;00;10 – 00;05;18;22
Unknown
What happened while we were there? Just a quick little jaunt to the shop we had to take. We had to kill about an hour and a half. Chaos. And I had a mission. I was looking for a sugar bowl. and as one does, a pink sugar bowl had to be cute and pink and like, fun. But reality is, the shops have become more elevated.
00;05;18;23 – 00;05;45;05
Unknown
Yeah. They’re not as, like, Becky boy likes to call them garage sale. Yeah. Drunk trolley like Liberty Hollow, which we do. We do like, that’s. But because we want it to be a little like trash can meets garbage because that’s when you’re like, I found it. Yes, that’s what we want. So. But then all of a sudden, the shops just escalated their game so much that we’re like, oh, I’m sorry, this is nice shit that actually costs money, money and can’t afford it.
00;05;45;08 – 00;06;08;21
Unknown
Yeah. So we were in there walking around and we’re on a specific mission and everybody knows we have to walk a certain way. So we’re going through our normal way and we’re talking chit chatting about who the hell knows what, all the kinds of things that we normally talk about. We just start talking and, we get around the corner to where, the Christmas tree is that I found your cheese balls because you’re a food tree.
00;06;08;23 – 00;06;24;22
Unknown
And I’m like, oh, this is it. This is where the food where where the the cheese balls are. Maybe they’re here. So we’re looking and she’s looking and she’s like, oh no, they’re not here. And what do I find? Nerds. Nerds. Her husband’s favorite candy. Oh darn it, we just told Mark. Got his Christmas present for next year.
00;06;24;22 – 00;06;45;23
Unknown
Oh, forget about it. It’s like, oh, he will forget nerds. He’s the other one that likes nerds. Oh, he loves the nerd. So I’m like the gummy cluster nerds, right? It wasn’t it wasn’t that one. But it was normal. So I hand it to her and then I immediately give a look and she’s like, what? I’m like. It’s the same price as the cheese balls that I refused to buy you, because it’s way too much money.
00;06;45;25 – 00;07;04;29
Unknown
And you had a moment of feelings. I know, I know, which is why I didn’t buy you the cheese balls. But then I quickly justified it by saying, well, this is this only the only one? Right. This this is only guess. Right? But anyway, they’re very, very cute. So we’re walking around with those and then we’re chit chat and we’re talking about all the things and we’re just, you know, bantering like we always do.
00;07;05;06 – 00;07;23;02
Unknown
We walk down the stairs. Wait a second. Wait. Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay. We walk down the aisle no I specific I’m sorry. Rewind back to the car and I say to her, I followed the shops on West Ridge on my Facebook page, and they posted today a pink wall with a whole bunch of. It’s like a new shop and I need to go to it.
00;07;23;09 – 00;07;42;06
Unknown
That’s why we went there, right? And then I said, I also need the sugar Bowl. I’m sorry. We were on the hunt for the pink wall because you wanted some weird crystal look in it was they called it a dreamcatcher? Yeah. It had, like, you were gonna wear it as a necklace, and it’s. Or like one of those, like, I didn’t think through.
00;07;42;08 – 00;07;58;04
Unknown
You had. Or I didn’t tell you. That’s what it was. I in fact, I don’t know. It’s better not to tell you what we’re up. So I just said it’s a pink wall. Yeah. So, And real clear, I forgot that that’s why we went in there and didn’t remember. That’s what we were. And our hands are completely full.
00;07;58;05 – 00;08;28;26
Unknown
We just. You just had the nerds. So we go downstairs because it’s two floors and we go to the the right, like we always do. And we are knee deep in some conversation. And you say, oh, I, I found, and you run into this booth and you’re pointing and you’re like, it’s a mini version. Now rewind. You know, a couple of years ago, prior to my husband building my office in my basement, now in my old garage, this was at least four years ago.
00;08;29;08 – 00;08;42;01
Unknown
can you believe it’s been that long? I know, Holy shit. Anyway, I distinctly remember saying to Aaron, I’m going to build. I’m going to put a rainbow on my wall. You’re like, what? And I said, just look at this, Instagram page. I found it, so I sent it to you, and she had a rainbow staircase.
00;08;42;01 – 00;09;03;02
Unknown
And I’m like, it’s pastel rainbow. I love it. And everybody’s like, that’s stupid. And I’m like, whatever, I’m doing it. So I made the pastel wall. You can see it on my Facebook anyway, or the rainbow wall. And so I’ve got obsessed with this woman and she her whole house is girly and cute, and my whole house is way too pink, so I’m very girly.
00;09;03;02 – 00;09;27;29
Unknown
What are. So, she had all these pictures in her kitchen of these sweet little canisters and, spice jars and stuff, and they were these little Victorian houses. So cute. 1989 Lenox Spice Village. So almost five years ago, I sent Aaron. I’m like, I need to have these. I need to have these. What do I do? She’s on a mission immediately.
00;09;28;01 – 00;09;43;15
Unknown
I’m looking it up. I’m on the Facebook. I’m on the Facebook marketplace. I’m like, I have it literally really hard to find on a note on my phone as one of your potential Christmas gifts. Some here, even though we don’t give each other Christmas gifts like I am, I know I’m on it. She’s always on it, right? And do we not?
00;09;43;15 – 00;10;08;22
Unknown
Two years ago, do I not say to you I found a whole set in Clifton Park? Where I grew up. My mom lives there. Yep. Contact the woman named Nala. Clifton park. Clifton park. It’s. But. Saratoga. Yeah. Albany. That’s where we’re about to grow up. You’re Albanians? Yeah, I am, yeah. Oh, okay. Well, literally, like, this set is maybe five minutes away from where her mother left.
00;10;08;25 – 00;10;29;00
Unknown
I think it’s perfect price. It’s $350, which is a great price for the canister set, right? No, it was it was the it. We were going to split it. Yeah, I set it all up, I coordinated I’ll drop the ball. Yeah. Never never follow through with it. It’s just I’m looking around right now wondering, is anyone surprised that this happened?
00;10;29;03 – 00;10;46;04
Unknown
I don’t follow through with any of it. Probably because I was like, that’s $150. That’s a lot of money. And then I got a deal with my mom. I got it like coordinated. She’s like Hulu and like, it’s just like, it’s like a thing. So I just never engage. Now, this was three years ago. Now you’re lucky to find the set for 1200 bucks.
00;10;46;04 – 00;11;05;11
Unknown
Oh, yeah. Hold on though, you’re at least I’ve seen recently. It was $900. And that is probably. They’re probably not in good condition. So we’re in that we’re. And reality is Erin really doesn’t know what she’s looking for. She knows what they look like, but she just he really didn’t know I think they’re this big. She’s looking like Hannah Sterling.
00;11;05;14 – 00;11;35;03
Unknown
They’re like a foot each. No. These are like, they’re they’re for, like, nutmeg and paprika. They’re spice basil. So she, she points to this booth, which we’re real clear is a hippie voodoo shit. Yeah. It’s all sage and crystals. Hippie voodoo shit. And there’s seven of Lennox houses, little mini house spice, and she’s like the canister. There’s a miniature version, and I look at her with tears in my eyes.
00;11;35;03 – 00;11;58;17
Unknown
You said. And I just found it. Oh, my God is. Found it! And I said, take that! We didn’t even look at the price. Now I’m very clear. If you go on eBay, they’re 50 bucks a house, 50 bucks better. Yeah. Very much. These were $10 apiece. Ten apiece. And I said all I said to hers. So this is not scrapping it, but, and then we’re like, walking like this around the store because they’re glass and like, how many?
00;11;58;17 – 00;12;12;07
Unknown
It’s like a thing. And so it’s, you know, and I’m thinking we didn’t we knew we were going to split them. And I looked and I go, you can pick any ones you want, but I get the pink one, but I want the pink one. That’s all I, I don’t care. So now we’re walking around and now I sit here, I’m like, I can’t, I can’t talk to you.
00;12;12;07 – 00;12;32;05
Unknown
I am so emotional about this I cannot function. And so we’re bantering. You say it over and over. Can’t believe you can’t believe like I can’t. But we found him. Oh, I guess so. So we go. We go around the corner and I’m holding these. And she’s holding hers with her nerds. And she’s. See, we see this, like, clothing, this walk.
00;12;32;07 – 00;12;54;25
Unknown
And she runs, but she doesn’t run. She goes over to where the horse gallops. Yeah. And there’s these tiger print pink, hot pink and black stiletto four inch heels and not bigger. Yeah. And she’s like, you have to wear these. And the and the owner of the shop is in there. Yeah. She’s standing right there. She’s like everything’s 40% off today.
00;12;54;25 – 00;13;15;07
Unknown
And they were only $15. You need this. And so I put them on and I shoved my fat out. They were shoved in. Yeah. We’re talking like when in Cinderella where she’s like this. It’s like I can’t quite fit in here. And not only that, but I had to take my sock off. So now it’s my sweaty ass.
00;13;15;10 – 00;13;35;19
Unknown
Yeah. Shovel feet, one foot in these shoes, and I’m walking around and. And the lady’s like, you look like you just walked in here with those. I’m like, yeah. And they’re it’s like, you don’t even know her. And you could tell that. That’s all right. So we are fully anticipating buying these, but I get halfway down the, the aisle and I’m wearing them I she’s carrying her ugly ass clad Mike.
00;13;35;19 – 00;13;51;10
Unknown
Yeah. And she’s wearing that my precious spice spice things. And I’m like I can’t wear these. They’re hurting so bad. And you’re like, well, you know who would wear them? Sawyer and I said, you’re right, you’re right. But I got to put these back. So I take them off and I run back and the woman’s still there.
00;13;51;10 – 00;14;09;13
Unknown
So I just throw them in the booth and I run away. So now we run to the other side, and we get around the corner, and we find our favorite booth. The hen, the hen house. Oh, yeah. And you are in your glory picking up everything. So many bird cages there. So now we’ve got a bird tray, a bird.
00;14;09;15 – 00;14;32;19
Unknown
What a bird cage. That’s so weird. See? Like an antique one or a like. Oh, just like a real bird. Lots of birds fly in. Yeah, yeah, that feels different. Yeah, but yeah, she hates birds, but her whole house is birdcages hate. So hate, I hate her. She’s like, I have one freaking bird comes fluttering at me. I am like, can’t everything in the house has birds rings?
00;14;32;21 – 00;14;50;16
Unknown
Yeah, yeah. Chickens. New kid. So she finds this bird tray. It’s a sweet little white tray with two birds on the end. She’s like, oh my God, I need to have this. I’m like, close your eyes. But she closed her eyes and I set up those damn spice containers on the right. Now open your eyes. She’s like, oh, I get it, get it.
00;14;50;16 – 00;15;11;03
Unknown
So we’re like, we’re just doing everything right. And at this point we still don’t have a car or basket. I’m sweating my motherfucking balls are we have lit. It’s like you’re at the grocery store. You got. You found a pillow, you found a pillow. We’ve got glass. Shit that we’re afraid of. I’m still probably still walking around with my clogs in my hand with socks on.
00;15;11;03 – 00;15;27;16
Unknown
At this point, who the frick knows? Mask sweating balls off because it’s snowing like a bitch outside and we have our winter coats on. So at one point and I have my six layers of hair extensions because we’re going to a party, right? So I say to her, it’s real hot in here, right? You’re like, I don’t know.
00;15;27;19 – 00;15;47;08
Unknown
I need to look at my bird stuff. So we go around the corner and then at this point, we’re starting to go to find the pink ball, and I have a business card in my hand because I’ve decided I’m going to email the woman from the Lenox Lenox to see if she finds any more that I have to do.
00;15;47;08 – 00;16;07;06
Unknown
She should just call us right at this point, I drop the business card out of my hand because I’m so sweaty. Okay, we both are filled with shit. Yep. Everywhere. And so we’re clear in this exact moment, one of us has to pick that up. One, we’re even more clear who it is to pick it up. It’s not so.
00;16;07;06 – 00;16;28;24
Unknown
It’s not. You hand me your pillow. So now I have the pillow and you go, I got you. Do you do the elevator mess? I do that you stand up and you, you do a full on squat, as slow as you can and not to drop. Yeah, me. Now I’m watching her go down. I’m watching her go down and my glasses go right down my nose.
00;16;28;27 – 00;16;51;09
Unknown
Because I’m sweating so bad. Right down. And I’m like, can you just push my glasses off? And you’re like, I’m trying to get I can I you’re like, can you push my glass? Yep. I’m like, I can’t even stand right now. My knees are broken. I am in a full blown squat. I am trying to get in my hands up like this, holding the stuff right, because I got my head and I’m telling you, go to the right and you’re like a cloth.
00;16;51;09 – 00;17;10;02
Unknown
Okay? Yeah. How? You go to the right. Go to the right. I can’t feel it. I can’t tell where that cart is. I am doing a full on squat I know, I know, and I’m like, I can’t do it with my glass houses. So this woman comes up behind us and she’s like, I feel like I need to help you both.
00;17;10;02 – 00;17;27;26
Unknown
And she takes my glasses and pushes it. Great. She said, I feel like I need to help you both. What can I do? And I said, push my glasses out. Push my glasses up. Yeah. She really pushes my glasses up and I push my head back. I’m like, okay, now guide her towards the car. I’m like, guys, I need help.
00;17;27;29 – 00;17;53;13
Unknown
Someone help me up. I am stuck like this. Am step like this. Give me your hand. So this woman gives me your hand. I’m now standing up again, still holding all my valuables, all of my value. But still no cart or. And we say thank you, ma’am. Right. Thank you. And then at one point prior to that, right before I dropped the card, there were these, decorative tote bags, and you yell, why don’t you take one of those tote bags and put her shit in it, and then we’re not going to buy it.
00;17;53;16 – 00;18;10;28
Unknown
And I’m pretty sure that’s when we got her attention. Yep. And so then we went through that whole scenario. And so we said, thank you so much. And then we continue to walk around the corner. And at that point is where I say to you, this is where I found the piece de resistance the other day. And you go, what?
00;18;10;28 – 00;18;32;27
Unknown
I go look in that booth. And what did you say? Are we talking about them? Right? Horse we discussed. But just pause for a minute. We said, I need you to pull these reports. I need you to pull everyone. I mean, it was everybody. Scott. Scott. Scott. We got one for you, too. What? You got me? Yeah, I got you a.
00;18;32;29 – 00;18;53;25
Unknown
Oh, it’s like a wild park, you know? It’s it’s a long year. Yes. So this one. No, you can’t say it like that. No. The pause button. Pause. Like pull. Like we’re from Queens. Yes, I got you. So we got we some like we to look at this. I know you coon. You knew it. You knew the pause were there.
00;18;53;25 – 00;19;14;06
Unknown
Yeah. It’s just with me. I know you did it. Yes, yes I did. In my story. I found it in my story. I turned into the booth and I was like, oh no, you’re my you’re right. Yeah. I went there and I went there yesterday with Sawyer to show her the pole, to show her the port. And I forgot you’re the one that found the pole.
00;19;14;06 – 00;19;33;15
Unknown
Oh, yeah. I turn the corner and you ask me, give me, give me your pool. Now let’s see what’s not missing in the damn face. Let me see. But listen, I need to tell the story of the pause. I’m like this, all right? I’m sitting on the frickin thing like 3.3. Pause. Just push. Just like this. Just up like this.
00;19;33;19 – 00;20;08;26
Unknown
And this is what I’m thinking in this moment. What, are you kidding? What are you right? Why? No, not only that, hell, but they have an authentic. Does anyone want a wooden, poor one? What is the wooden plank? Okay. And they were named. And so then I look and attached to it is an US certificate of authenticity. Like I’m buying a damn Cabbage Patch doll or in a wrestling it it has a, it has like a, like a seal a real seal stamp.
00;20;08;26 – 00;20;35;07
Unknown
I know it’s multi-color. I know it’s like, this is the straw berry for your very, creamsicle pour. What? So I look at you and I’m like, number one, you talk about pores all the time. So that’s the funniest turtle. Why? I love cat paws. But you can’t say paw. You have to say that was because my daughter, back in the day, she’s like, mom, look at me.
00;20;35;13 – 00;20;56;27
Unknown
Look at taste is what’s what. So now we. That’s like the running joke. For years. You have to touch the cat. So I turn and these paws are right there. And I’m like I am so confused about yet. Right. And then, what do we do? I look at the price. Gotta look at the right $20, $25 for the bird.
00;20;56;29 – 00;21;24;25
Unknown
A paw. I’m gonna pay $25. Yeah. Now we have all the shenanigans and I’m like, I need to have the paw. You’re like $20, 25 bucks. So then don’t comes around the corner, does it? Glass push. Lady grass come around the corner. And she says, you guys, I am really sorry that I’m eavesdropping on your conversation. All I want to do is follow you around the store and video record you.
00;21;24;28 – 00;21;36;27
Unknown
Literally what she says you guys are. That’s all. I just. Yeah, you should have said we should have gone. Pause. Pause. Gotcha. Pause.
00;21;36;29 – 00;21;54;24
Unknown
And again, maybe lady a GoPro helmet. Lady. Lady, I’m gonna need you to. Lady. Pause. Boom boom boom boom.
00;21;54;26 – 00;22;17;21
Unknown
Boom boom boom boom boom. Okay. It’s like how a real cat does it. Yeah. Support it. Lady, I’m gonna need you to pause the cats chop it. Up we go. Well, we have a podcast. Yes. We’re immediately like, well, we have a podcast. Just listen up. More love. So why are you good. All your podcasts. Yep, yep. So then what do we do.
00;22;17;21 – 00;22;34;27
Unknown
Other arm. So you can pull out your card with QR code. And if Rebecca had her damn stickers, she could have give her one. But she doesn’t know rose. Stupid things. she’s the only one who has any left. It’s true, it’s true. So we did that. Oh my God, thank you. She’s like, I am not kidding. I’m really trying to not listen to you guys.
00;22;34;27 – 00;22;53;17
Unknown
I cannot not listen to you. You are hilarious. She said I was at the pawn shop looking at you. Yeah, we’re like a goddamn train wreck. No, I said, I did. Yeah, so does every day. Right. So then today. So then we still haven’t found the pink wall. So we move forward. And at this point we need some serious help.
00;22;53;17 – 00;23;09;16
Unknown
So we tell it. We asked the the man at the bottom of the stairs and say, there is a pink wall vendor here somewhere. They don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about. No. No idea. I’m like, what on the face? Better than the face. But what about on the Facebook page? So they radio a bunch of people.
00;23;09;19 – 00;23;27;01
Unknown
We we. He’s, like, bothering me. Wait, that’s my favorite. Wait. This one happens. This. They’re like, oh, that’s Cindy’s booth three. That’s Cindy’s it. I think that’s Cindy. Cindy here. Cindy is here right now. Right. So then they walk us over to the first booth and we’re like that Cindy settings. It’s not Cindy. It’s that one thing else.
00;23;27;07 – 00;23;44;09
Unknown
And so. So then they walk us to another one and we finally get there. And we look at it and we’re like underwhelmed. Yeah, the hell is going on here? I wanted one thing, and it was the one thing that was sold. Yep, I think I said this, this is what we spent all this time looking for. I mean, we found the ports and then.
00;23;44;15 – 00;24;05;06
Unknown
And then what happens? The music shuts off. No, wait, wait. No. He brings us a basket. Yeah. And he’s. I remember his name was Bob, but his name is Bob. Because as Bob is helping us fill up our basket, you hear Bob, right? We need a we need a water run. Bob, I got Bob’s. Tell me, Ben. I said you said tell my busy.
00;24;05;06 – 00;24;24;16
Unknown
I’m like, let me get on that thing, pop. Now I’ll be, like, busy with another customer, find someone else. But when we did get to the pink wall, there were four pictures and one of the four pictures was missing. They were like, posters of different US cities. Yeah. And you say, oh, I would have bought all four of those.
00;24;24;20 – 00;24;37;25
Unknown
So he comes over with the basket and he goes, what do I want to wait, put the name on the basket, and I go, whoever got that last picture, that’s the name. That’s.
00;24;37;28 – 00;24;57;27
Unknown
No, it’s the one said. I said, you can put it on her back three because that’s we were walking around the shops. We are. We see this like bathrobes, bathrobe that says B.H. and you’re like, oh my God, it’s my initials. And I’m like, yeah, in my head, that’s what I’m doing. My head. Rebecca r h what?
00;24;57;29 – 00;25;18;10
Unknown
What do you mean? Those are your initials and you’re like backs. Becky backs. Everybody calls me Becky Herzog. I said, no, no, that’s how that works. You don’t use pet names here, monogram. That’s not. That’s not how that works, b h and then. So then, of course, I’m walking around this, this woman again with the, with the glasses.
00;25;18;10 – 00;25;39;25
Unknown
It’s nearby. And I’m like, yeah, I go by Superchunk Collagen. So ACH, it’s my initials. And I did it. I said, oh my God, you have to call me Superchunk. In a long time I have heard that a lot. So we’re dying. But anyway, so he takes our stuff away and we immediately FaceTime, Skype. Yeah. So I’m like, we got to get Scott on the horn.
00;25;39;25 – 00;25;59;13
Unknown
Yep. Got say I said, got something about the pause. Pause. We gotta get Scott on the horn. So what did we do. We called Scott. Oh, that was that was an experience. He’s definitely experience. Kelly’s on the on the couch. And she was watching TV or listening to something on her phone. Cheddar, AirPods and and her ears.
00;25;59;15 – 00;26;22;05
Unknown
And she’s looking over and she’s going, because I was just going, what? To what? Oh, well, yeah. And then I’m laughing because you guys are, as usual, both talking at the same time. and and oh, and it’s cutting out too, so it’s like or, so it was like, it was like a little mini hurricane FaceTimed me.
00;26;22;07 – 00;26;39;19
Unknown
That’s par for the course. That’s par for the course. Yeah. Earlier in the day, we did FaceTime shopping. We ended it by saying, Scott, we put both of our faces in the camera. We’re like, Scott, you looking at your money maker? Ha!
00;26;39;21 – 00;27;03;28
Unknown
And that’s what Kelly said. I’m his money maker. That’s right, that’s right, that’s right. I’m like, yep, she has better. She’s always made more money than me. It’s funny. Oh God. Wow. That was our. So that’s funny though. If we could go 30 years into the future and that conversation you just had would still be relevant. Oh, that was me doing.
00;27;04;01 – 00;27;25;02
Unknown
You guys could be in your 90s and would have asked, have you seen those two old women? Oh, yeah. On and on the like there. And some emails or the TikTok or whatever. And they’re these two old women and they are hilarious. They are exactly the same way. Yeah. I have no doubt. Yeah. And we’ll have even more stories to reference.
00;27;25;02 – 00;27;49;29
Unknown
You’re the nasty crotch one in the front seat of the car. Yeah. And I’m the one in the back who’s like, oh, here, here. Hey, I got this for you. Did you want an extra coffee? You know, when you’re, like, kind of hot coffee? Like, they are hilarious, Yeah. So it’s going to be the same. Just stay with us on the journey because we going to be along for years of this craziness.
00;27;50;02 – 00;28;07;14
Unknown
That’s incredible. But pack a lunch. And what does that have to do with empathy? We don’t know. We don’t know. But yeah, we were just letting you know that, whatever. You know, today’s podcast is about shopping and pausing what’s important to show. So so that’s what’s even funnier is was it this morning? It was last night. We were.
00;28;07;16 – 00;28;27;11
Unknown
You and I were chatting on the phone and I use this. You said something. I go, wait a minute, pause. If I go, imagine me holding up, I can’t pull out and you’re dying. And I’m like, I’m gonna print those out for tomorrow. We really try to be like, what’s this, Scott? We really tried to get you one of the, hairless, hairless cat.
00;28;27;14 – 00;28;46;01
Unknown
We tried. I tried real hard. Really, really hard. And everything look like a batwing. Yeah, it just wasn’t good. It was not good. And I’m like, no one’s gonna know what the pork that we’re doing look like. An absolute nut sack. I mean, they’re already. Yeah, exactly. They already look like a nut sack. So then I went with the long haired.
00;28;46;04 – 00;29;07;28
Unknown
Yeah, you. You got me a coon. That’s a cool to me on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That’s great. That’s right. Next. That’s that’s, I have a video to show you today is a cat video. Yeah, actually, it’s the. Oh, there’s paws, all right. Yeah. There’s twice. So, I might have found this video and I watched it and I was like, oh.
00;29;07;28 – 00;29;25;26
Unknown
And a lot of thoughts about that. So I thought, oh, Senator Scott, let’s just send it to Rebecca Gray, how she feels about this. And I’ll be honest, if this guy verdicts out, Rebecca is going to go one of two ways on this. She’s going to be like, absolutely, I would do that. Or she’s going to be like, what is wrong with that person?
00;29;26;00 – 00;29;41;17
Unknown
Can we mention the fact that I went to the doctor yesterday and I officially have to wear readers now? Oh, so you gonna put those on? I’m gonna put them on to see if they’re gonna help me. Yeah. Do you get these as a dollar? I got these at the dollar store, but I ordered different ones on Amazon because they’re.
00;29;41;18 – 00;30;00;07
Unknown
They’re bigger, like normal. This is weird to me. I need the full glasses. So this is my temporary version. And I busted out our old friend. Oh, girlfriend. Voodoo hippies. So you could try your minute try. I’m a try. Okay, try to read it. I’m gonna send you a pair of clicks and you can work. Oh, yeah. You’re not like me.
00;30;00;07 – 00;30;19;04
Unknown
I mean, that sounds good. That sounds really great. I did see a pair at the dollar. Sure. They’re folded. Make sure they’re pink. Scott. Yeah, they got everything, so. Yeah. All right. Are we working? Yeah. All right. Scott. So Scott Scott. Not good skies kind of video. It was my 16 year old cat that passed away in February by dog attack.
00;30;19;06 – 00;30;55;12
Unknown
We had her body preserved and she’s currently in this box. I hate packing peanuts, so not how I wanted to receive my cat. Here’s her little heart in my oh my God. Oh, who? I can’t, I can’t, you can’t, you can’t keep going. Stop! Me! Freeze! Strider! That’s the ice. He’s not taxidermied. She’s actually fully intact. Meaning she was never skinned.
00;30;55;15 – 00;31;26;17
Unknown
And, all of her bones are actually still inside. The only part of her that was actually removed in order to get her to this place was her organs. So essentially, make an incision. We pull out all of the organs, then they have those organs cremated. That’s one thing. Then they freeze dried the heart alongside the cat. In the end, she was simply put in a dryer and dried at very low temperatures to become gauze.
00;31;26;19 – 00;31;54;07
Unknown
Try to focus the screen decided Scott loves cat love. Freeze dried, freeze drying preserves animals in the most natural state possible, as they are frozen whole after being positioned in the desired pose. So this is a very valuable question. So let’s answer it. A lot of people have told me that they simply don’t think that they would feel okay seeing their pet sitting on a table or on a couch or something after they got them back from the taxidermist or freeze dryer.
00;31;54;10 – 00;32;17;02
Unknown
This is valid, but how do I feel about getting her back? I have been very, very, very excited since she was in the mail when Carrie from Animal Family Pet texted me and said that she was being dropped off and she was being shipped that day. I was so excited. I was, I was it was it was. I was ecstatic, especially because I had almost no communication with them at all throughout the drying process.
00;32;17;04 – 00;32;23;12
Unknown
But how do I feel seeing her every day since she came home?
00;32;23;15 – 00;32;46;06
Unknown
Oh wow. Oh my gosh. Oh, it’s so good to see you again. Like I am very, very, very happy to see her again and very happy to wake up next to her every morning and they can pet her. Serene posted their story on social media and got millions of views on their videos. This is the biggest question of the day.
00;32;46;07 – 00;33;06;22
Unknown
Not surprising, but how much does it cost to have a cat freeze dried? Mind you, lucky cat was 9 pounds. She was not a large cat. She was very small. So her cost is going to be far less than someone, say with a 15 pound cat or a 90 pound dog. So here’s my receipt. So I had my cat freeze dried through.
00;33;06;22 – 00;33;46;13
Unknown
Animal family pet. Here is kind of a breakdown of the receipt here. A 9 to 9 and a half pound cat costs about 1744 45 to have her heart freeze dried, $150 to have her organs cremated, the rest of her organs. That was $175 and a deposit to get everything started was a cool 2190. And then at the end, when she was finished and ready to come home before she was shipped me off, this is the last deposit, and that’s a solid $811.68, making the total cost of her VIP expedited freeze dry within 6 to 8 weeks instead of 6 to 8 months.
00;33;46;13 – 00;34;08;10
Unknown
A total of $2,998.68, which I’m incredibly thankful that we were able to raise most of the money for the preservation through donations and selling memorial pieces through my tiny small business. So basically, with the help of my community, we were able to pay to have local fat free stroganoff, which I cannot even tell you how grateful I am for how long this is from video.
00;34;08;14 – 00;34;20;26
Unknown
Somebody donated that. Good morning. Okay. All right. Yeah. We’re good. We got enough content. I think.
00;34;20;28 – 00;34;35;12
Unknown
I pause what? Where do you where are you going to start? Where do you want to start?
00;34;35;15 – 00;34;44;09
Unknown
Ladies and gentlemen. Speechless. We finally made her speechless.
00;34;44;11 – 00;35;06;27
Unknown
Okay. Oh, I’m good for you for doing whatever weird shit you do. But the minute you entertain a go fund me is when it really pisses me off. Part. That’s part three. You’re right over the edge. It was GoFundMe. Me. No, it didn’t throw me over the edge. It makes me angry. Oh, okay. How are you? The story about Alyssa milano now?
00;35;06;29 – 00;35;29;10
Unknown
Yeah. You know who Alyssa milano is, right? Yes. She, She was from who? The. Who’s the boss in the craft? She, started this GoFundMe. Me for her kids, baseball team, and everybody was freaking out because she drives a $200,000 car. And you’re like, really? You’re going to try to raise money for your kid’s baseball team?
00;35;29;13 – 00;35;54;11
Unknown
I can’t, but actually she donated a lot of money to the team. And she’s teaching them how to be fundraisers. So I get it. But still she’s a multimillionaire. She just suck it up and just fun the team. Just like, how much money does a baseball team need, right? I mean, this is for, like, a trip somewhere. I think they’re going to the Baseball Hall of Fame or some stuff.
00;35;54;18 – 00;36;14;21
Unknown
Great. Get some bottles and cans. Baseball kids go to, I don’t know, freeze dried cat. Go. Your thoughts on that? Don’t think about it. Just answer. It’s hard for me because it’s an animal I know I did, so I, I did have a moment where I got very overemotional and I did not like that. Okay. You got overemotional?
00;36;14;21 – 00;36;35;20
Unknown
About what? The fact that the cat was freeze dried or the cat was dead. The cat was dead. Okay. And that we had to bring it back in. You didn’t like that. We had to bring it back in? No, because 1 or 2 motion, it’s too emotional. So when she says it’s on my bedside and I wake up to it and I just get to pet it and I’m like, no, that’s not not is not like that.
00;36;35;20 – 00;36;57;20
Unknown
You didn’t not that next level. Right? So you didn’t like what? You didn’t like the fact that we brought it back? Yeah. After it was dead. I don’t like the go. Me. Yeah. I didn’t like that she talked to it. I didn’t like that she pet it. Okay. What. What about the fact that it was in a separate box.
00;36;57;25 – 00;37;08;11
Unknown
And I’m like that part. I didn’t like how much she paid for this experience. Okay. Did you like anything about it.
00;37;08;14 – 00;37;34;15
Unknown
Get to get to see those toe beans the rest of your life. Oh, Toby. My. Yeah, that’s what was there. These are the toe beans. That’s the part of the plot. These are the toe beans. Okay, just learn something else from the glossary of Rebecca’s. So it’s. I am very emotionally attached to my cat. It will not be a good day.
00;37;35;25 – 00;38;03;16
Unknown
I’m aware I get it. But, I will not go so far as to stuff it, bring it back into my home. Your level of control right now and how you’re having this conversation is unfucking real. As I get real, what is going on for you? What feelings are coming up in your body when you are, when you are watching that video, tell our listeners they deserve to hear deserve this.
00;38;03;21 – 00;38;29;06
Unknown
It’s too weird. I can’t hear the emotional component when she when she went through the emotional journey of choosing to honor her cat in some capacity, and then it coming back to her and getting getting the heartfelt like getting a cremated animal, you know? Yes. But then we open it and we have the freeze dried cat. It’s just too much.
00;38;29;09 – 00;38;43;17
Unknown
It’s too much. I didn’t like that. That heart was in a box. Where should it be? I didn’t I don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see the fact that it’s an I don’t I don’t want anything to do with that heart. And I don’t want that heart to come back to me. So I found myself fascinated.
00;38;43;17 – 00;38;58;01
Unknown
Yeah. Why would she have the other organs? And then what do you do with it? I don’t know, right. So that was that. I had a reaction to that. I also had a reaction to the fact that the freeze dried cat was in packing peanuts. Yes. And so I thought to myself, we can do better than that. We we can.
00;38;58;03 – 00;39;24;23
Unknown
If I’m getting my animal back, I’m going to expect that it’s going to be in something that feels more preserving of who my cat is, like in The Last coffin or not. But I put it on a cat bed, you know, or like, make it something that feels like it wasn’t just a freeze dried cat thrown into a box with some packing peanuts like you got from Amazon.
00;39;24;25 – 00;39;49;11
Unknown
Yeah, I need it to have. I didn’t buy textbooks, you know, like, I need to take a little more. More like. Yeah. Kindness. Okay. Associated with I can I can see that I it’s like a trophy. Yeah. Yeah. It’s no longer a being that you loved. It’s a keepsake. It’s like now I was about to make a reference and I’m choosing to not.
00;39;49;16 – 00;40;05;28
Unknown
Okay. All right, I’ll tell you after. Okay. I’m going to let you not do that because I can only imagine what it is I’m going to choose to keep to myself. I push you for it. That’s the whole thing’s going down. I’m going to keep it to myself. And if you, join the more love, subscription, even more love.
00;40;06;01 – 00;40;27;19
Unknown
Yeah. I’m still not sure you’re going to hear about it. Not sharing anything for a price. No, you’re going to get it in the, the after reels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. so I had a reaction to that. I did appreciate that the ears were further supported by a little extra bubble wrap, and I appreciated that because that was I couldn’t.
00;40;27;19 – 00;40;49;02
Unknown
Yeah, I thought it was, here. No, it was bubble wrap. So let’s head out my glasses to see. And I couldn’t see. I thought it was great ears. No, no normal black ears. Just bubble wrap. But I appreciate that because again, I don’t want to get my animal in one of its half. Its ears fall off when she said she put it in the dryer was it like a tumbling dryer?
00;40;49;02 – 00;41;06;07
Unknown
Now, I had a reaction to that too. I don’t need to know the process. for me, I don’t need to know the details about what we did with the organs or those types of things. I just need to know that I now have this animal that was my my animal, you know? Right. I have a question. Who’s the person?
00;41;06;09 – 00;41;36;09
Unknown
One that figured out you can do this? And two, decided to make business out of it. Isn’t that kind of weird? How did they know to say no? Absolutely. I’ll say now. Oh, it is weird, Scott. So it’s not weird. What’s weird about it? I have a feeling about stuffing any kind of animal, so it’s weird to me, even though they say they say they specifically made a point to say it’s not taxidermy, right?
00;41;36;09 – 00;42;03;14
Unknown
Because it’s very striking. Which is implying in my mind, implying that taxidermy is less taxidermy is a beneath this process. It’s not as, they didn’t skin the cat even used the word skinned, which is right. So it’s more humane. That’s not dead. Does it matter? Yeah. No. So I could just throw use a dryer until it dries and they put it in the position like it was was.
00;42;03;21 – 00;42;38;13
Unknown
Okay, you go for it. I did a research project in my PhD program. here she goes for, qualitative in the PhD in psychology. And because she dated a man that on the taxidermy. Yeah. Tannery. The tannery, you get stuffed every. So I had to go and learn about something that I knew absolutely nothing about through the sequence of five, six different interviews sessions.
00;42;38;15 – 00;43;08;25
Unknown
So I picked Cantrell Taxidermy, and I went and I sat with him for hours and watched him do taxa dummy. And the research findings that came out of this was how much taxidermists really appreciate and value animals, how much they, he showed me the process of the skinning. In fact, the title of my research was called Getting All the Chunks Out.
00;43;09;07 – 00;44;00;11
Unknown
the Art of taxidermy. And he talked at great length about the expertise that’s needed and that the goal of taxidermy is to be able to preserve the looks of that particular animal so that you can continue to relive that memory, that excitement, that whatever. So I noticed when she was talking about the freeze dried process versus the taxidermy process, that it it was surprising to me that we would even need to distinguish between that, because I can see the process of taxidermy being that you have to essentially skin the cat, literally, and then put it on a form, and the form might or might not look the way that you want your cat to
00;44;00;11 – 00;44;28;13
Unknown
look. Whereas the freeze dried process is essentially, it sounds like the entirety of the cat minus its organs, and it might be more realistic looking because you haven’t had to go through the process of skinning it, putting fake eyes on it, you know, all of that stuff. So I didn’t find myself bothered at all about that process, except for the fact that I was like, we don’t really need to create a distinction between those two.
00;44;28;13 – 00;45;00;10
Unknown
There are two very different art forms, but I’m surprised to hear that you guys would think that there was something weird or like, not normal or confusing about is it why someone would want that? Or is it the actual process or what? What is it? Well, I never heard of freestyling before. Yeah. Me neither. And I frankly, I equate taxidermy with trophy.
00;45;00;12 – 00;45;16;18
Unknown
They’re not I don’t yeah, I think so. Catches a fish or they got a bear or something. Yes. You don’t, you don’t. Yeah. It’s not like my lab died. So I’m going to bring it to a taxidermist sometimes. I’m sure I’ve heard, but I don’t think I don’t think that’s the norm is what I’m saying. I think it’s a with trophy.
00;45;16;21 – 00;45;33;15
Unknown
You shoot a deer, you want the head mounted because it’s a trophy. Like a bad ass, right? But, Erin, as a psychologist, wouldn’t you say that that’s kind of a problem for people unable to let go of their pet, so they have to have it stuffed and sitting in their living room with them and interact with it the way she did.
00;45;33;15 – 00;46;05;25
Unknown
That’s the part I to talk to. The interact like that. Is that healthy? So I think that when we get into the discussion, that’s how I personally feel about what is normal and what is abnormal. We’re actually denying people the opportunity to respond in a way that feels authentic to them. Now, are there times where that is going to go too far and where we’re going to need to have some type of psychological intervention?
00;46;05;25 – 00;46;39;03
Unknown
Because let’s say, we’ve been unable to detach from the fact that this is not a real animal. Right. Or it’s gone past the point of just being comfort. It’s moved more on to more of a psychological. Oddity. Like I’ve been somewhere filling the bowl full of food rotting. Correct. So it’s not for me the the process of how people grieve.
00;46;39;03 – 00;47;04;01
Unknown
In this case, it’s about the lengths to which they participate and have awareness of the way they’re participating in this grief process. So I think you just gave a great example, Scott, if this woman now is treating this life a life like a life cat, it’s eating it is walking it over to the water dish is putting it right research to do those things.
00;47;04;01 – 00;47;29;00
Unknown
If people come over to this woman’s house and she’s like, oh, did you see so-and-so say hello to so-and-so, right? Right. Versus it just sitting next to her on the bed? Yes. For me, my response to that, though, which is different, I’m hearing is not, oh my God, that’s so weird. Okay. This is not okay. My response to that is okay, this is extreme pain and grief, and we need to try and reel this back in.
00;47;29;00 – 00;47;49;27
Unknown
We need to we need to do what we need to do to get this person on a healthier track. They have disassociated from the reality of this. So it’s not as clear cut to answer your questions, Scott, to me as what is normal? Grieving? What is not normal grieving? Because I think grief just looks the way grief looks.
00;47;50;16 – 00;48;11;06
Unknown
but there is some lines or some experiences that feel more extreme to me that then are a clue to me in this field that we need to help people come back to a healthier place of relatability. With that.
00;48;11;09 – 00;48;36;23
Unknown
I would agree, you guys are hilarious. Where’s my cricket button? If you guys are holy, I would just keep coming back to emotional intelligence. I. I respect that whole dissertation that you blessed us with. There’s nothing. No, I, I don’t think of that when when you show me the video, I’m thinking that’s weird. Like, because I wouldn’t do that.
00;48;37;22 – 00;48;57;28
Unknown
but I don’t think of it as well. That person is going through grief. And how can I help them? So if you you’re a helper, you want to figure out how can I get this person past this problem where I’m just like, I see the problem. I’m moving on. Thank you. Ma’am. You know, so I mean, kudos to you for that.
00;48;58;03 – 00;49;22;09
Unknown
So this is Rebecca and I had this session before the session today. It was just something pretty similar to this. And that’s what I want to help understand more is I believe when people have a stark reaction about that’s not normal or that is weird or that is not okay, that we’ve won denied ourself of an opportunity to really understand that person’s true experience.
00;49;22;09 – 00;50;00;09
Unknown
But two, we’re not really paying attention to why our defense mechanisms are in place that are causing us to have that reaction. So that’s what’s interesting to me always about people, anyone having a really stark reaction to, oh my gosh, that’s so odd, or oh my gosh, that, that is not okay. Right. And to immediately shut it down and I don’t know if this is my training or if this is just my personality or whatever, but I, I honestly cannot think of a lot of things in life that I would immediately put into a category of, wow, this, this is not okay.
00;50;00;16 – 00;50;21;12
Unknown
This is still wow, that is really frickin weird. Now, I might have some reactions immediately that I’m like, interesting. Okay, I’m finding myself very curious about that, right? I had a reaction when she put the cat on the nightstand and started talking to it. My reaction wasn’t, what the hell are you doing? Right? My reaction was, okay, that that’s not good.
00;50;21;14 – 00;50;47;16
Unknown
Okay, that that might not be okay. But then immediately I went to well, maybe she’s just doing that for the video. Maybe she’s just doing that for the camera. Maybe she’s just, you know, trying to showcase could be true. We don’t know, right? We don’t know her. It kind of felt like guesses, but it’s giving people the benefit of the doubt before going to a place of complete judgment and right off, if you will, about and so.
00;50;47;16 – 00;51;10;11
Unknown
Well, clearly people supported her because she did a go fund me. Yeah. Looks like her community, her community was all in right. If nobody gave her money, they would. That would speak volumes to me. Yes. And I find the fact that people supported and gave money to it to be really interesting as well, because I’m curious about how that came to be.
00;51;10;11 – 00;51;29;05
Unknown
Correct. Because I there’s got to be a back story. Yes. And so again, it’s approaching it from this place of curiosity that I’m like, oh, wow, she was able to raise money. Tell me more about that. Right. But I don’t think if if we aren’t approaching those types of conversations from a tell me more about that. That’s really interesting.
00;51;29;05 – 00;51;46;12
Unknown
Wow. I find that fascinating. I’m having a reaction to that. Where is that coming up? Is that my stuff or is that her stuff? If we’re not doing that, then I think were denying ourselves an opportunity to look further into something which, as we discussed in the car, may be the exact reason why we’re doing that. And in some ways I think that’s okay too.
00;51;46;13 – 00;52;11;04
Unknown
Right? So in the car we were talking about how Rebecca was shut it down real quick just by being like, that’s weird. I don’t like that. All done not having a conversation about that. And I’m actually okay with that so long as the next statement is, I shut that down real quick, because that is so odd for me that a lot of feelings came up for me, that I don’t want to talk about it, because I just don’t even want to go to that place.
00;52;11;22 – 00;52;31;28
Unknown
it’s that level of like acknowledgment that that’s why we’re doing the thing that we’re doing that I can hang with all day. It’s when people have their immediate, you know, stark. That’s weird. Your weird. Why are you doing that reaction with no acknowledgment of what’s coming up for them that I’m like, I get angry or I’m like, why are we doing that?
00;52;31;29 – 00;53;02;07
Unknown
Why we have to do that to people like, I don’t? Life is not that. And this is going to sound real ironic coming from me. Clear cut, definitive, specific. Right now, I’m not the expert on this. I’m totally open to hearing both you and Scott difference of opinion on that. But I’m curious because I do think that the reactions you guys are having is a much more normal, usual reaction that people would have.
00;53;02;09 – 00;53;27;07
Unknown
I think we just I because I’m trying to I’m trying to think of a way to articulate something that that makes sense or I don’t know how to articulate this. I think that at the end of the day, I don’t I don’t know how to say this. The only, the only thing you can keep coming up with is I like the idea of being exclusive and being.
00;53;27;09 – 00;53;52;28
Unknown
Tight knit and I don’t know, I’m not I’m not a open arm. Embrace it all. Come as you are type of person I don’t. I believe in the idea of having exclusivity. I like that idea of only certain people can be involved in. There are only certain people. People get together in these like minded groups because of X, Y and z.
00;53;53;01 – 00;54;18;08
Unknown
I don’t know how to articulate that in a way that doesn’t sound mean or. Closed off. It’s not about that. It’s about not everybody can get into the sorority. Right? Like. And why? Why is that? Right. So I think it’s okay to have an opinion or have feeling about somebody and just be like, you. Do you? That’s great.
00;54;18;11 – 00;54;38;17
Unknown
I’m not going to contribute to that. Go fund me. But no, I’m okay with that too. You can because that’s because I wouldn’t I wouldn’t have contributed to that. Go fund me. Right. That doesn’t speak to me, but it’s more about if we have that reaction of, oh my God, that’s so weird, why the hell is she doing something like that?
00;54;38;18 – 00;54;59;00
Unknown
And I just cannot. Okay. Why is she being like that? Do you think that that is a healthy place for the person who’s saying that to be, as well as the healthy place for what we want this world to be, is the haves and the have nots, the do’s and don’ts, the. That’s weird and that’s not weird that that level of definitive ness.
00;54;59;05 – 00;55;18;22
Unknown
I’m okay with that, though. I’m okay with with that split. I think for me it’s the action. If if I think that a person doing that is weird, that’s, you know, that’s my prerogative. I’m, I’m I can think that’s weird. However, I’m not going to go out of my way or I’m not going to do something to put them on blast.
00;55;18;26 – 00;55;37;15
Unknown
Yeah, I’m not going to go ridicule them or, you know, do something to hurt them because I don’t think I will think to myself, that’s weird. And then never go to them and say, you’re frickin nuts, dude. I would just be like, oh yeah, okay, cool. And I and I certainly wouldn’t approach it from curiosity. I want to be like, let me know more.
00;55;37;16 – 00;56;01;17
Unknown
Yeah, it’s I don’t care. I’m like, this is weird. Moving on. I mean, once again, I, I’m right here in the middle. I know I can see, I can see both hundred percent. I can see her point of view too. I’m just I’m not as thoughtful as Aaron. Oh, great. Don’t I don’t think about how can I help this person from where they are in this whole situation.
00;56;01;17 – 00;56;21;24
Unknown
I just think that’s weird. Okay. Moving on. Right. But I can and maybe it is your training. Maybe it is because you come from that background. You spent a lot of time there and you know, you’re profession is to get to know people and to help guide and ask the questions and to really get to the core of what they’re experiencing.
00;56;21;24 – 00;56;36;04
Unknown
So it all makes sense to me. I don’t think that that’s a natural tendency. It might be for some people. Right. But I’m thinking, was that a belch? It was good for you deep down.
00;56;36;06 – 00;57;09;16
Unknown
I don’t know, I think that’s really interesting because I, I’m not saying that I want to have a full blown conversation with this woman to try and figure out who she is and what her what her grief was and what I I’m not interested in being this woman’s therapist. Right. But just the process of watching the video to me suggests that, you know, if we’re looking at it with a frame on it, that and correct me if I’m wrong about it, I don’t want to put you in the wrong category here, but as you’re watching that, you immediately have this lens on.
00;57;09;17 – 00;57;41;11
Unknown
That’s like weird, uncomfortable. Why not? Okay, oh my gosh, gofund me. Not acceptable. And then and then move on. Well, I don’t know if any of if all those words were accurate. because there was an emotional component for sure. For me, at least for me, I was that it was more of a definitive judgment. Right? It was more so if we used the lens of definitive opinionated versus my lens was more, oh, interesting and curious.
00;57;41;17 – 00;57;59;08
Unknown
No, I don’t think anything’s definitive. I think it was. I didn’t think less of her in any way. Right. I just thought that that it was it was weird. And it’s not something I would do. But I didn’t think. But I can understand as a grieving person or something like that. I was just like, wow. And that’s not something I would do, right?
00;57;59;10 – 00;58;15;14
Unknown
And it’s weird. And you do you do her own. Very. So I felt the same way you guys did, except for the weird component. you didn’t think it was weird? Oh, you didn’t see it that way. You said curious. I didn’t I don’t really have a judgment on if it was weird or not. I found myself curious about it.
00;58;15;14 – 00;58;33;27
Unknown
Okay. Right. So the word weird versus the word curious for me is the difference. Because I also would not freeze dry my cat, I. That is also not a way that I would grieve, right? I don’t want to receive Sullivan’s heart in a box, you know, like, so. But so what a Nirvana song. Yeah. My heart in a box.
00;58;34;17 – 00;58;55;21
Unknown
so what’s interesting is I’m having the same reaction that you guys are all in complete agreement that we’re not. We’re not getting our caps freeze dry at any time soon, nor taxidermied. Right. We’ve we’re all clear about that. It’s just it’s just the, and for me, when I say that’s weird, it’s because that’s too emotional. That’s what’s weird about it.
00;58;55;21 – 00;59;22;29
Unknown
Interesting. Way too emotional. You know what else is really interesting? Our hamster died yesterday. Oh. Oh. That’s sad, you know, and send it out, you know, just throw him out. It’s okay. I mean, we buried the last couple. Are you, like, put them in the trash? Just do strip. Yeah, I came home and so we wrote words. Paws in the air.
00;59;23;05 – 00;59;40;19
Unknown
Kelly came home. Abby was, Abby was upset. Or she called her because she was upset that that the the hamster died doesn’t have a name. So, Angel was. That was the name of the hamster? It was a little tiny thing. So cute. And I’m not, I’m not a rodent, dude, I don’t like rye. I don’t care for rodents too much, but.
00;59;40;20 – 01;00;03;20
Unknown
Okay. This was very cuddly. Little. It loved her. I don’t know, weird, but, she was upset. And so Kelly immediately went out and bought another one. Oh, and came back with this hamster. Before Abby even knew that that was happening, she just came and said, here, here’s another hamster, okay? And took the other hamster and just threw it in the trash, okay?
01;00;03;20 – 01;00;20;16
Unknown
Because I came home later, found out the whole story, and then she’s like, yeah, can you put the trash out? Because that’s going to start to stink. I’m like, what? What? And I just threw it in the trash. I’m like, oh my God, okay, how insensitive can you be? Okay, so you didn’t have any desire to take it out and give it a proper burial?
01;00;20;19 – 01;00;45;14
Unknown
I didn’t want to take it out of the trash. Why are we trying to get a new hamster to pass this angel? No no no no no, it was a it was a. You’re sad. Let me make it better immediately. Yes, yes, I know she can’t, so I. We don’t have enough time to process all this. I have so many questions associated with us.
01;00;45;14 – 01;01;02;02
Unknown
So we have stay tuned. We have a complete we’ve just watched about a freeze dried cat, and we went into all the different feelings and thoughts associated with it. And then your example is we throw Angel right into the trash can. And we didn’t want anyone to feel any feelings about it. So we went and bought another one.
01;01;02;08 – 01;01;25;29
Unknown
We I was not involved in any part of that transaction to open the trash can. Here we go. Angel food. Oh my. My reaction was you just threw her away. Yeah, I went and buried the bird. I went and buried three different hamsters. We got little crosses out there. We said a prayer. Wow. Oh, yeah. We pay. We pay respects to our pets.
01;01;26;00 – 01;01;44;10
Unknown
Not for Angel. There’s no angel. God, Abernathy. Look at that. B, we’ve done with her. Like to fly up to the heavens. I have my limits. And my limit is I’m not going to go into the trash where my wife has already thrown out a dead hamster. Dig it out, and then go dig a hole and bury it in the snow.
01;01;45;02 – 01;01;52;12
Unknown
That’s where I draw the wire. You could have set the whole bag on fire.
01;01;52;14 – 01;02;13;12
Unknown
I got to talk about that and I’ll put it on your porch and you come down to stop it out. No. Yeah. Wait till it goes down to ashes and then bear the ashes I loved that. Me too. Isn’t empathy amazing? Well, we’re amazing. I don’t know about all that sympathy stuff. That’s fine. I accept you wherever you are.
01;02;13;19 – 01;02;37;15
Unknown
Oh, God, I love you. I love you too. And if you love us, please like and subscribe to more. Love the power of Empathy podcast wherever you get your podcasts. See you next time.
Unknown
All right, we got practice. We’re good, we’re good. Just had to start over. Sorry about that. Okay. Time.
00;00;16;15 – 00;00;38;27
Unknown
Hey, it’s me Aaron. Thanks for joining us on the Moor Love podcast. Do not tell Rebecca, but this podcast is about empathy. She likes people to think she’s dead inside. But the truth is, she’s a big time feeler who has truly helped me uncover that empathy is my superpower. Oh, here she comes. Hey, bestie. Hi, love. What are you doing?
00;00;38;28 – 00;01;03;09
Unknown
Oh, just getting ready to host a podcast. A podcast about what? Our life. Our life as best friends. Who are more like sisters. yay! I love that, and I can’t wait to share our stories of the world. especially the ones that involve us pushing each other right to be our most authentic selves. Oh, man. Okay. It’s cards, man.
00;01;03;09 – 00;01;21;26
Unknown
Okay. What a card you picked. Yeah. How many ounces? Based on our. Based on our conversation on the card before we go. Yeah. You mean the session we had before? Yeah. How many ounces? How many yards? 12. 12. But, you know, I only drink half of it. Six. So six. I got put in my points. Four points. It’s not bad.
00;01;21;29 – 00;01;41;18
Unknown
That’s not bad. But that plus my stack and bacon have my points. Reject or. Yeah. Actually, ex, can I ask you. Yeah. You can ask anything you want. What are you doing? Are you doing, like, Weight Watchers? Oh, yeah, I’m doing that. I mean, doing the. Oh, I mean, we can talk about those. Listen, Scott. So can I, yeah.
00;01;41;19 – 00;02;09;05
Unknown
Can I? Can I be your health coach? Oh, absolutely. I mean, yeah, look at me. You want me yours? You you you have to try. I love like I love on plan because. No, but I only get 23 points a day. What you don’t know about me is this your lifetime? No. I, back in my in my 30s, I was in Uber great shape and was a a fiend about fitness and nutrition.
00;02;09;08 – 00;02;34;13
Unknown
Oh, and know everything there is to know. And then some. And what happened? Stop it, stop it. Well, well, because that is not look real good. Did not mean it. Like that’s what she did. No, I don’t mean I’m not in great shape and it doesn’t go through and then what? But listen. So what’s next? you’re such an ass.
00;02;34;14 – 00;02;58;14
Unknown
It’s all here. It’s all in your head. Oh, what? The whole. Everything about what you want to do with your. With weight and with eating and all that stuff. It’s all in your freaking head. No pressure. Sure, I could, like I couldn’t I self-medicated with food. Sure. Yeah. And beer and vodka. So I couldn’t give food up. So I had to give the other stuff.
00;02;58;17 – 00;03;33;22
Unknown
Yes and yes. For five years. Today, five years. Oh, congratulations. Five years sober for real. That’s I is a absolutely gigantic, huge accomplishment. Yeah. Don’t think we spend enough time acknowledging how much it takes to get your psyche in a place where you’re ready to quit a substance that has been causing you turmoil. I will say that, there’s a book called This Naked Mind by a woman named, Annie Grace.
00;03;33;22 – 00;03;54;22
Unknown
That really, really kind of changed my whole thought process on alcohol. I’m gonna write that down. It’s, I actually had her on my podcast. We don’t talk about other podcasts on this podcast. but there’s other. But there there are no what’s mine. Oh, and, headlines that you guys made. why isn’t he had us on his.
00;03;54;22 – 00;04;14;00
Unknown
Yeah. Why? He. Oh, I just I just started it back up. I haven’t done it. Oh, yeah. Shocking. Oh, so we weren’t the first. Okay. It’s fine. You’re on the list. Oh, God. Oh, God is great. He just added it right now. Yeah. We’re okay. Yeah, I just making milk. It’s like a little tiny, like, could it put it on there?
00;04;14;02 – 00;04;20;28
Unknown
Well, congratulations. That’s amazing. I crossed out the word shit list.
00;04;21;00 – 00;04;39;10
Unknown
You guys are number one. That’s right. That’s. Well, we do tend to call you. We’ve now resorted. We used to just call the three women that we just FaceTime. yeah, we we just say. So we got calls. Got so what? We’re going to see what we’re going to sell. I can’t do it live now. But what we’re going to see in the edit right now is, is the FaceTime video.
00;04;39;10 – 00;05;00;06
Unknown
No audio because I’m guessing not smart enough to record audio. Oh automatically recorded but happened. But I have. When you guys FaceTimed me from that antique store, you recorded it? Yeah. The shop, the shops at West Westbridge. Oh, my God, I recorded that. Oh, yeah. I think we should talk about that. Yeah, let’s do it. Let’s do it.
00;05;00;10 – 00;05;18;22
Unknown
What happened while we were there? Just a quick little jaunt to the shop we had to take. We had to kill about an hour and a half. Chaos. And I had a mission. I was looking for a sugar bowl. and as one does, a pink sugar bowl had to be cute and pink and like, fun. But reality is, the shops have become more elevated.
00;05;18;23 – 00;05;45;05
Unknown
Yeah. They’re not as, like, Becky boy likes to call them garage sale. Yeah. Drunk trolley like Liberty Hollow, which we do. We do like, that’s. But because we want it to be a little like trash can meets garbage because that’s when you’re like, I found it. Yes, that’s what we want. So. But then all of a sudden, the shops just escalated their game so much that we’re like, oh, I’m sorry, this is nice shit that actually costs money, money and can’t afford it.
00;05;45;08 – 00;06;08;21
Unknown
Yeah. So we were in there walking around and we’re on a specific mission and everybody knows we have to walk a certain way. So we’re going through our normal way and we’re talking chit chatting about who the hell knows what, all the kinds of things that we normally talk about. We just start talking and, we get around the corner to where, the Christmas tree is that I found your cheese balls because you’re a food tree.
00;06;08;23 – 00;06;24;22
Unknown
And I’m like, oh, this is it. This is where the food where where the the cheese balls are. Maybe they’re here. So we’re looking and she’s looking and she’s like, oh no, they’re not here. And what do I find? Nerds. Nerds. Her husband’s favorite candy. Oh darn it, we just told Mark. Got his Christmas present for next year.
00;06;24;22 – 00;06;45;23
Unknown
Oh, forget about it. It’s like, oh, he will forget nerds. He’s the other one that likes nerds. Oh, he loves the nerd. So I’m like the gummy cluster nerds, right? It wasn’t it wasn’t that one. But it was normal. So I hand it to her and then I immediately give a look and she’s like, what? I’m like. It’s the same price as the cheese balls that I refused to buy you, because it’s way too much money.
00;06;45;25 – 00;07;04;29
Unknown
And you had a moment of feelings. I know, I know, which is why I didn’t buy you the cheese balls. But then I quickly justified it by saying, well, this is this only the only one? Right. This this is only guess. Right? But anyway, they’re very, very cute. So we’re walking around with those and then we’re chit chat and we’re talking about all the things and we’re just, you know, bantering like we always do.
00;07;05;06 – 00;07;23;02
Unknown
We walk down the stairs. Wait a second. Wait. Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay. We walk down the aisle no I specific I’m sorry. Rewind back to the car and I say to her, I followed the shops on West Ridge on my Facebook page, and they posted today a pink wall with a whole bunch of. It’s like a new shop and I need to go to it.
00;07;23;09 – 00;07;42;06
Unknown
That’s why we went there, right? And then I said, I also need the sugar Bowl. I’m sorry. We were on the hunt for the pink wall because you wanted some weird crystal look in it was they called it a dreamcatcher? Yeah. It had, like, you were gonna wear it as a necklace, and it’s. Or like one of those, like, I didn’t think through.
00;07;42;08 – 00;07;58;04
Unknown
You had. Or I didn’t tell you. That’s what it was. I in fact, I don’t know. It’s better not to tell you what we’re up. So I just said it’s a pink wall. Yeah. So, And real clear, I forgot that that’s why we went in there and didn’t remember. That’s what we were. And our hands are completely full.
00;07;58;05 – 00;08;28;26
Unknown
We just. You just had the nerds. So we go downstairs because it’s two floors and we go to the the right, like we always do. And we are knee deep in some conversation. And you say, oh, I, I found, and you run into this booth and you’re pointing and you’re like, it’s a mini version. Now rewind. You know, a couple of years ago, prior to my husband building my office in my basement, now in my old garage, this was at least four years ago.
00;08;29;08 – 00;08;42;01
Unknown
can you believe it’s been that long? I know, Holy shit. Anyway, I distinctly remember saying to Aaron, I’m going to build. I’m going to put a rainbow on my wall. You’re like, what? And I said, just look at this, Instagram page. I found it, so I sent it to you, and she had a rainbow staircase.
00;08;42;01 – 00;09;03;02
Unknown
And I’m like, it’s pastel rainbow. I love it. And everybody’s like, that’s stupid. And I’m like, whatever, I’m doing it. So I made the pastel wall. You can see it on my Facebook anyway, or the rainbow wall. And so I’ve got obsessed with this woman and she her whole house is girly and cute, and my whole house is way too pink, so I’m very girly.
00;09;03;02 – 00;09;27;29
Unknown
What are. So, she had all these pictures in her kitchen of these sweet little canisters and, spice jars and stuff, and they were these little Victorian houses. So cute. 1989 Lenox Spice Village. So almost five years ago, I sent Aaron. I’m like, I need to have these. I need to have these. What do I do? She’s on a mission immediately.
00;09;28;01 – 00;09;43;15
Unknown
I’m looking it up. I’m on the Facebook. I’m on the Facebook marketplace. I’m like, I have it literally really hard to find on a note on my phone as one of your potential Christmas gifts. Some here, even though we don’t give each other Christmas gifts like I am, I know I’m on it. She’s always on it, right? And do we not?
00;09;43;15 – 00;10;08;22
Unknown
Two years ago, do I not say to you I found a whole set in Clifton Park? Where I grew up. My mom lives there. Yep. Contact the woman named Nala. Clifton park. Clifton park. It’s. But. Saratoga. Yeah. Albany. That’s where we’re about to grow up. You’re Albanians? Yeah, I am, yeah. Oh, okay. Well, literally, like, this set is maybe five minutes away from where her mother left.
00;10;08;25 – 00;10;29;00
Unknown
I think it’s perfect price. It’s $350, which is a great price for the canister set, right? No, it was it was the it. We were going to split it. Yeah, I set it all up, I coordinated I’ll drop the ball. Yeah. Never never follow through with it. It’s just I’m looking around right now wondering, is anyone surprised that this happened?
00;10;29;03 – 00;10;46;04
Unknown
I don’t follow through with any of it. Probably because I was like, that’s $150. That’s a lot of money. And then I got a deal with my mom. I got it like coordinated. She’s like Hulu and like, it’s just like, it’s like a thing. So I just never engage. Now, this was three years ago. Now you’re lucky to find the set for 1200 bucks.
00;10;46;04 – 00;11;05;11
Unknown
Oh, yeah. Hold on though, you’re at least I’ve seen recently. It was $900. And that is probably. They’re probably not in good condition. So we’re in that we’re. And reality is Erin really doesn’t know what she’s looking for. She knows what they look like, but she just he really didn’t know I think they’re this big. She’s looking like Hannah Sterling.
00;11;05;14 – 00;11;35;03
Unknown
They’re like a foot each. No. These are like, they’re they’re for, like, nutmeg and paprika. They’re spice basil. So she, she points to this booth, which we’re real clear is a hippie voodoo shit. Yeah. It’s all sage and crystals. Hippie voodoo shit. And there’s seven of Lennox houses, little mini house spice, and she’s like the canister. There’s a miniature version, and I look at her with tears in my eyes.
00;11;35;03 – 00;11;58;17
Unknown
You said. And I just found it. Oh, my God is. Found it! And I said, take that! We didn’t even look at the price. Now I’m very clear. If you go on eBay, they’re 50 bucks a house, 50 bucks better. Yeah. Very much. These were $10 apiece. Ten apiece. And I said all I said to hers. So this is not scrapping it, but, and then we’re like, walking like this around the store because they’re glass and like, how many?
00;11;58;17 – 00;12;12;07
Unknown
It’s like a thing. And so it’s, you know, and I’m thinking we didn’t we knew we were going to split them. And I looked and I go, you can pick any ones you want, but I get the pink one, but I want the pink one. That’s all I, I don’t care. So now we’re walking around and now I sit here, I’m like, I can’t, I can’t talk to you.
00;12;12;07 – 00;12;32;05
Unknown
I am so emotional about this I cannot function. And so we’re bantering. You say it over and over. Can’t believe you can’t believe like I can’t. But we found him. Oh, I guess so. So we go. We go around the corner and I’m holding these. And she’s holding hers with her nerds. And she’s. See, we see this, like, clothing, this walk.
00;12;32;07 – 00;12;54;25
Unknown
And she runs, but she doesn’t run. She goes over to where the horse gallops. Yeah. And there’s these tiger print pink, hot pink and black stiletto four inch heels and not bigger. Yeah. And she’s like, you have to wear these. And the and the owner of the shop is in there. Yeah. She’s standing right there. She’s like everything’s 40% off today.
00;12;54;25 – 00;13;15;07
Unknown
And they were only $15. You need this. And so I put them on and I shoved my fat out. They were shoved in. Yeah. We’re talking like when in Cinderella where she’s like this. It’s like I can’t quite fit in here. And not only that, but I had to take my sock off. So now it’s my sweaty ass.
00;13;15;10 – 00;13;35;19
Unknown
Yeah. Shovel feet, one foot in these shoes, and I’m walking around and. And the lady’s like, you look like you just walked in here with those. I’m like, yeah. And they’re it’s like, you don’t even know her. And you could tell that. That’s all right. So we are fully anticipating buying these, but I get halfway down the, the aisle and I’m wearing them I she’s carrying her ugly ass clad Mike.
00;13;35;19 – 00;13;51;10
Unknown
Yeah. And she’s wearing that my precious spice spice things. And I’m like I can’t wear these. They’re hurting so bad. And you’re like, well, you know who would wear them? Sawyer and I said, you’re right, you’re right. But I got to put these back. So I take them off and I run back and the woman’s still there.
00;13;51;10 – 00;14;09;13
Unknown
So I just throw them in the booth and I run away. So now we run to the other side, and we get around the corner, and we find our favorite booth. The hen, the hen house. Oh, yeah. And you are in your glory picking up everything. So many bird cages there. So now we’ve got a bird tray, a bird.
00;14;09;15 – 00;14;32;19
Unknown
What a bird cage. That’s so weird. See? Like an antique one or a like. Oh, just like a real bird. Lots of birds fly in. Yeah, yeah, that feels different. Yeah, but yeah, she hates birds, but her whole house is birdcages hate. So hate, I hate her. She’s like, I have one freaking bird comes fluttering at me. I am like, can’t everything in the house has birds rings?
00;14;32;21 – 00;14;50;16
Unknown
Yeah, yeah. Chickens. New kid. So she finds this bird tray. It’s a sweet little white tray with two birds on the end. She’s like, oh my God, I need to have this. I’m like, close your eyes. But she closed her eyes and I set up those damn spice containers on the right. Now open your eyes. She’s like, oh, I get it, get it.
00;14;50;16 – 00;15;11;03
Unknown
So we’re like, we’re just doing everything right. And at this point we still don’t have a car or basket. I’m sweating my motherfucking balls are we have lit. It’s like you’re at the grocery store. You got. You found a pillow, you found a pillow. We’ve got glass. Shit that we’re afraid of. I’m still probably still walking around with my clogs in my hand with socks on.
00;15;11;03 – 00;15;27;16
Unknown
At this point, who the frick knows? Mask sweating balls off because it’s snowing like a bitch outside and we have our winter coats on. So at one point and I have my six layers of hair extensions because we’re going to a party, right? So I say to her, it’s real hot in here, right? You’re like, I don’t know.
00;15;27;19 – 00;15;47;08
Unknown
I need to look at my bird stuff. So we go around the corner and then at this point, we’re starting to go to find the pink ball, and I have a business card in my hand because I’ve decided I’m going to email the woman from the Lenox Lenox to see if she finds any more that I have to do.
00;15;47;08 – 00;16;07;06
Unknown
She should just call us right at this point, I drop the business card out of my hand because I’m so sweaty. Okay, we both are filled with shit. Yep. Everywhere. And so we’re clear in this exact moment, one of us has to pick that up. One, we’re even more clear who it is to pick it up. It’s not so.
00;16;07;06 – 00;16;28;24
Unknown
It’s not. You hand me your pillow. So now I have the pillow and you go, I got you. Do you do the elevator mess? I do that you stand up and you, you do a full on squat, as slow as you can and not to drop. Yeah, me. Now I’m watching her go down. I’m watching her go down and my glasses go right down my nose.
00;16;28;27 – 00;16;51;09
Unknown
Because I’m sweating so bad. Right down. And I’m like, can you just push my glasses off? And you’re like, I’m trying to get I can I you’re like, can you push my glass? Yep. I’m like, I can’t even stand right now. My knees are broken. I am in a full blown squat. I am trying to get in my hands up like this, holding the stuff right, because I got my head and I’m telling you, go to the right and you’re like a cloth.
00;16;51;09 – 00;17;10;02
Unknown
Okay? Yeah. How? You go to the right. Go to the right. I can’t feel it. I can’t tell where that cart is. I am doing a full on squat I know, I know, and I’m like, I can’t do it with my glass houses. So this woman comes up behind us and she’s like, I feel like I need to help you both.
00;17;10;02 – 00;17;27;26
Unknown
And she takes my glasses and pushes it. Great. She said, I feel like I need to help you both. What can I do? And I said, push my glasses out. Push my glasses up. Yeah. She really pushes my glasses up and I push my head back. I’m like, okay, now guide her towards the car. I’m like, guys, I need help.
00;17;27;29 – 00;17;53;13
Unknown
Someone help me up. I am stuck like this. Am step like this. Give me your hand. So this woman gives me your hand. I’m now standing up again, still holding all my valuables, all of my value. But still no cart or. And we say thank you, ma’am. Right. Thank you. And then at one point prior to that, right before I dropped the card, there were these, decorative tote bags, and you yell, why don’t you take one of those tote bags and put her shit in it, and then we’re not going to buy it.
00;17;53;16 – 00;18;10;28
Unknown
And I’m pretty sure that’s when we got her attention. Yep. And so then we went through that whole scenario. And so we said, thank you so much. And then we continue to walk around the corner. And at that point is where I say to you, this is where I found the piece de resistance the other day. And you go, what?
00;18;10;28 – 00;18;32;27
Unknown
I go look in that booth. And what did you say? Are we talking about them? Right? Horse we discussed. But just pause for a minute. We said, I need you to pull these reports. I need you to pull everyone. I mean, it was everybody. Scott. Scott. Scott. We got one for you, too. What? You got me? Yeah, I got you a.
00;18;32;29 – 00;18;53;25
Unknown
Oh, it’s like a wild park, you know? It’s it’s a long year. Yes. So this one. No, you can’t say it like that. No. The pause button. Pause. Like pull. Like we’re from Queens. Yes, I got you. So we got we some like we to look at this. I know you coon. You knew it. You knew the pause were there.
00;18;53;25 – 00;19;14;06
Unknown
Yeah. It’s just with me. I know you did it. Yes, yes I did. In my story. I found it in my story. I turned into the booth and I was like, oh no, you’re my you’re right. Yeah. I went there and I went there yesterday with Sawyer to show her the pole, to show her the port. And I forgot you’re the one that found the pole.
00;19;14;06 – 00;19;33;15
Unknown
Oh, yeah. I turn the corner and you ask me, give me, give me your pool. Now let’s see what’s not missing in the damn face. Let me see. But listen, I need to tell the story of the pause. I’m like this, all right? I’m sitting on the frickin thing like 3.3. Pause. Just push. Just like this. Just up like this.
00;19;33;19 – 00;20;08;26
Unknown
And this is what I’m thinking in this moment. What, are you kidding? What are you right? Why? No, not only that, hell, but they have an authentic. Does anyone want a wooden, poor one? What is the wooden plank? Okay. And they were named. And so then I look and attached to it is an US certificate of authenticity. Like I’m buying a damn Cabbage Patch doll or in a wrestling it it has a, it has like a, like a seal a real seal stamp.
00;20;08;26 – 00;20;35;07
Unknown
I know it’s multi-color. I know it’s like, this is the straw berry for your very, creamsicle pour. What? So I look at you and I’m like, number one, you talk about pores all the time. So that’s the funniest turtle. Why? I love cat paws. But you can’t say paw. You have to say that was because my daughter, back in the day, she’s like, mom, look at me.
00;20;35;13 – 00;20;56;27
Unknown
Look at taste is what’s what. So now we. That’s like the running joke. For years. You have to touch the cat. So I turn and these paws are right there. And I’m like I am so confused about yet. Right. And then, what do we do? I look at the price. Gotta look at the right $20, $25 for the bird.
00;20;56;29 – 00;21;24;25
Unknown
A paw. I’m gonna pay $25. Yeah. Now we have all the shenanigans and I’m like, I need to have the paw. You’re like $20, 25 bucks. So then don’t comes around the corner, does it? Glass push. Lady grass come around the corner. And she says, you guys, I am really sorry that I’m eavesdropping on your conversation. All I want to do is follow you around the store and video record you.
00;21;24;28 – 00;21;36;27
Unknown
Literally what she says you guys are. That’s all. I just. Yeah, you should have said we should have gone. Pause. Pause. Gotcha. Pause.
00;21;36;29 – 00;21;54;24
Unknown
And again, maybe lady a GoPro helmet. Lady. Lady, I’m gonna need you to. Lady. Pause. Boom boom boom boom.
00;21;54;26 – 00;22;17;21
Unknown
Boom boom boom boom boom. Okay. It’s like how a real cat does it. Yeah. Support it. Lady, I’m gonna need you to pause the cats chop it. Up we go. Well, we have a podcast. Yes. We’re immediately like, well, we have a podcast. Just listen up. More love. So why are you good. All your podcasts. Yep, yep. So then what do we do.
00;22;17;21 – 00;22;34;27
Unknown
Other arm. So you can pull out your card with QR code. And if Rebecca had her damn stickers, she could have give her one. But she doesn’t know rose. Stupid things. she’s the only one who has any left. It’s true, it’s true. So we did that. Oh my God, thank you. She’s like, I am not kidding. I’m really trying to not listen to you guys.
00;22;34;27 – 00;22;53;17
Unknown
I cannot not listen to you. You are hilarious. She said I was at the pawn shop looking at you. Yeah, we’re like a goddamn train wreck. No, I said, I did. Yeah, so does every day. Right. So then today. So then we still haven’t found the pink wall. So we move forward. And at this point we need some serious help.
00;22;53;17 – 00;23;09;16
Unknown
So we tell it. We asked the the man at the bottom of the stairs and say, there is a pink wall vendor here somewhere. They don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about. No. No idea. I’m like, what on the face? Better than the face. But what about on the Facebook page? So they radio a bunch of people.
00;23;09;19 – 00;23;27;01
Unknown
We we. He’s, like, bothering me. Wait, that’s my favorite. Wait. This one happens. This. They’re like, oh, that’s Cindy’s booth three. That’s Cindy’s it. I think that’s Cindy. Cindy here. Cindy is here right now. Right. So then they walk us over to the first booth and we’re like that Cindy settings. It’s not Cindy. It’s that one thing else.
00;23;27;07 – 00;23;44;09
Unknown
And so. So then they walk us to another one and we finally get there. And we look at it and we’re like underwhelmed. Yeah, the hell is going on here? I wanted one thing, and it was the one thing that was sold. Yep, I think I said this, this is what we spent all this time looking for. I mean, we found the ports and then.
00;23;44;15 – 00;24;05;06
Unknown
And then what happens? The music shuts off. No, wait, wait. No. He brings us a basket. Yeah. And he’s. I remember his name was Bob, but his name is Bob. Because as Bob is helping us fill up our basket, you hear Bob, right? We need a we need a water run. Bob, I got Bob’s. Tell me, Ben. I said you said tell my busy.
00;24;05;06 – 00;24;24;16
Unknown
I’m like, let me get on that thing, pop. Now I’ll be, like, busy with another customer, find someone else. But when we did get to the pink wall, there were four pictures and one of the four pictures was missing. They were like, posters of different US cities. Yeah. And you say, oh, I would have bought all four of those.
00;24;24;20 – 00;24;37;25
Unknown
So he comes over with the basket and he goes, what do I want to wait, put the name on the basket, and I go, whoever got that last picture, that’s the name. That’s.
00;24;37;28 – 00;24;57;27
Unknown
No, it’s the one said. I said, you can put it on her back three because that’s we were walking around the shops. We are. We see this like bathrobes, bathrobe that says B.H. and you’re like, oh my God, it’s my initials. And I’m like, yeah, in my head, that’s what I’m doing. My head. Rebecca r h what?
00;24;57;29 – 00;25;18;10
Unknown
What do you mean? Those are your initials and you’re like backs. Becky backs. Everybody calls me Becky Herzog. I said, no, no, that’s how that works. You don’t use pet names here, monogram. That’s not. That’s not how that works, b h and then. So then, of course, I’m walking around this, this woman again with the, with the glasses.
00;25;18;10 – 00;25;39;25
Unknown
It’s nearby. And I’m like, yeah, I go by Superchunk Collagen. So ACH, it’s my initials. And I did it. I said, oh my God, you have to call me Superchunk. In a long time I have heard that a lot. So we’re dying. But anyway, so he takes our stuff away and we immediately FaceTime, Skype. Yeah. So I’m like, we got to get Scott on the horn.
00;25;39;25 – 00;25;59;13
Unknown
Yep. Got say I said, got something about the pause. Pause. We gotta get Scott on the horn. So what did we do. We called Scott. Oh, that was that was an experience. He’s definitely experience. Kelly’s on the on the couch. And she was watching TV or listening to something on her phone. Cheddar, AirPods and and her ears.
00;25;59;15 – 00;26;22;05
Unknown
And she’s looking over and she’s going, because I was just going, what? To what? Oh, well, yeah. And then I’m laughing because you guys are, as usual, both talking at the same time. and and oh, and it’s cutting out too, so it’s like or, so it was like, it was like a little mini hurricane FaceTimed me.
00;26;22;07 – 00;26;39;19
Unknown
That’s par for the course. That’s par for the course. Yeah. Earlier in the day, we did FaceTime shopping. We ended it by saying, Scott, we put both of our faces in the camera. We’re like, Scott, you looking at your money maker? Ha!
00;26;39;21 – 00;27;03;28
Unknown
And that’s what Kelly said. I’m his money maker. That’s right, that’s right, that’s right. I’m like, yep, she has better. She’s always made more money than me. It’s funny. Oh God. Wow. That was our. So that’s funny though. If we could go 30 years into the future and that conversation you just had would still be relevant. Oh, that was me doing.
00;27;04;01 – 00;27;25;02
Unknown
You guys could be in your 90s and would have asked, have you seen those two old women? Oh, yeah. On and on the like there. And some emails or the TikTok or whatever. And they’re these two old women and they are hilarious. They are exactly the same way. Yeah. I have no doubt. Yeah. And we’ll have even more stories to reference.
00;27;25;02 – 00;27;49;29
Unknown
You’re the nasty crotch one in the front seat of the car. Yeah. And I’m the one in the back who’s like, oh, here, here. Hey, I got this for you. Did you want an extra coffee? You know, when you’re, like, kind of hot coffee? Like, they are hilarious, Yeah. So it’s going to be the same. Just stay with us on the journey because we going to be along for years of this craziness.
00;27;50;02 – 00;28;07;14
Unknown
That’s incredible. But pack a lunch. And what does that have to do with empathy? We don’t know. We don’t know. But yeah, we were just letting you know that, whatever. You know, today’s podcast is about shopping and pausing what’s important to show. So so that’s what’s even funnier is was it this morning? It was last night. We were.
00;28;07;16 – 00;28;27;11
Unknown
You and I were chatting on the phone and I use this. You said something. I go, wait a minute, pause. If I go, imagine me holding up, I can’t pull out and you’re dying. And I’m like, I’m gonna print those out for tomorrow. We really try to be like, what’s this, Scott? We really tried to get you one of the, hairless, hairless cat.
00;28;27;14 – 00;28;46;01
Unknown
We tried. I tried real hard. Really, really hard. And everything look like a batwing. Yeah, it just wasn’t good. It was not good. And I’m like, no one’s gonna know what the pork that we’re doing look like. An absolute nut sack. I mean, they’re already. Yeah, exactly. They already look like a nut sack. So then I went with the long haired.
00;28;46;04 – 00;29;07;28
Unknown
Yeah, you. You got me a coon. That’s a cool to me on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That’s great. That’s right. Next. That’s that’s, I have a video to show you today is a cat video. Yeah, actually, it’s the. Oh, there’s paws, all right. Yeah. There’s twice. So, I might have found this video and I watched it and I was like, oh.
00;29;07;28 – 00;29;25;26
Unknown
And a lot of thoughts about that. So I thought, oh, Senator Scott, let’s just send it to Rebecca Gray, how she feels about this. And I’ll be honest, if this guy verdicts out, Rebecca is going to go one of two ways on this. She’s going to be like, absolutely, I would do that. Or she’s going to be like, what is wrong with that person?
00;29;26;00 – 00;29;41;17
Unknown
Can we mention the fact that I went to the doctor yesterday and I officially have to wear readers now? Oh, so you gonna put those on? I’m gonna put them on to see if they’re gonna help me. Yeah. Do you get these as a dollar? I got these at the dollar store, but I ordered different ones on Amazon because they’re.
00;29;41;18 – 00;30;00;07
Unknown
They’re bigger, like normal. This is weird to me. I need the full glasses. So this is my temporary version. And I busted out our old friend. Oh, girlfriend. Voodoo hippies. So you could try your minute try. I’m a try. Okay, try to read it. I’m gonna send you a pair of clicks and you can work. Oh, yeah. You’re not like me.
00;30;00;07 – 00;30;19;04
Unknown
I mean, that sounds good. That sounds really great. I did see a pair at the dollar. Sure. They’re folded. Make sure they’re pink. Scott. Yeah, they got everything, so. Yeah. All right. Are we working? Yeah. All right. Scott. So Scott Scott. Not good skies kind of video. It was my 16 year old cat that passed away in February by dog attack.
00;30;19;06 – 00;30;55;12
Unknown
We had her body preserved and she’s currently in this box. I hate packing peanuts, so not how I wanted to receive my cat. Here’s her little heart in my oh my God. Oh, who? I can’t, I can’t, you can’t, you can’t keep going. Stop! Me! Freeze! Strider! That’s the ice. He’s not taxidermied. She’s actually fully intact. Meaning she was never skinned.
00;30;55;15 – 00;31;26;17
Unknown
And, all of her bones are actually still inside. The only part of her that was actually removed in order to get her to this place was her organs. So essentially, make an incision. We pull out all of the organs, then they have those organs cremated. That’s one thing. Then they freeze dried the heart alongside the cat. In the end, she was simply put in a dryer and dried at very low temperatures to become gauze.
00;31;26;19 – 00;31;54;07
Unknown
Try to focus the screen decided Scott loves cat love. Freeze dried, freeze drying preserves animals in the most natural state possible, as they are frozen whole after being positioned in the desired pose. So this is a very valuable question. So let’s answer it. A lot of people have told me that they simply don’t think that they would feel okay seeing their pet sitting on a table or on a couch or something after they got them back from the taxidermist or freeze dryer.
00;31;54;10 – 00;32;17;02
Unknown
This is valid, but how do I feel about getting her back? I have been very, very, very excited since she was in the mail when Carrie from Animal Family Pet texted me and said that she was being dropped off and she was being shipped that day. I was so excited. I was, I was it was it was. I was ecstatic, especially because I had almost no communication with them at all throughout the drying process.
00;32;17;04 – 00;32;23;12
Unknown
But how do I feel seeing her every day since she came home?
00;32;23;15 – 00;32;46;06
Unknown
Oh wow. Oh my gosh. Oh, it’s so good to see you again. Like I am very, very, very happy to see her again and very happy to wake up next to her every morning and they can pet her. Serene posted their story on social media and got millions of views on their videos. This is the biggest question of the day.
00;32;46;07 – 00;33;06;22
Unknown
Not surprising, but how much does it cost to have a cat freeze dried? Mind you, lucky cat was 9 pounds. She was not a large cat. She was very small. So her cost is going to be far less than someone, say with a 15 pound cat or a 90 pound dog. So here’s my receipt. So I had my cat freeze dried through.
00;33;06;22 – 00;33;46;13
Unknown
Animal family pet. Here is kind of a breakdown of the receipt here. A 9 to 9 and a half pound cat costs about 1744 45 to have her heart freeze dried, $150 to have her organs cremated, the rest of her organs. That was $175 and a deposit to get everything started was a cool 2190. And then at the end, when she was finished and ready to come home before she was shipped me off, this is the last deposit, and that’s a solid $811.68, making the total cost of her VIP expedited freeze dry within 6 to 8 weeks instead of 6 to 8 months.
00;33;46;13 – 00;34;08;10
Unknown
A total of $2,998.68, which I’m incredibly thankful that we were able to raise most of the money for the preservation through donations and selling memorial pieces through my tiny small business. So basically, with the help of my community, we were able to pay to have local fat free stroganoff, which I cannot even tell you how grateful I am for how long this is from video.
00;34;08;14 – 00;34;20;26
Unknown
Somebody donated that. Good morning. Okay. All right. Yeah. We’re good. We got enough content. I think.
00;34;20;28 – 00;34;35;12
Unknown
I pause what? Where do you where are you going to start? Where do you want to start?
00;34;35;15 – 00;34;44;09
Unknown
Ladies and gentlemen. Speechless. We finally made her speechless.
00;34;44;11 – 00;35;06;27
Unknown
Okay. Oh, I’m good for you for doing whatever weird shit you do. But the minute you entertain a go fund me is when it really pisses me off. Part. That’s part three. You’re right over the edge. It was GoFundMe. Me. No, it didn’t throw me over the edge. It makes me angry. Oh, okay. How are you? The story about Alyssa milano now?
00;35;06;29 – 00;35;29;10
Unknown
Yeah. You know who Alyssa milano is, right? Yes. She, She was from who? The. Who’s the boss in the craft? She, started this GoFundMe. Me for her kids, baseball team, and everybody was freaking out because she drives a $200,000 car. And you’re like, really? You’re going to try to raise money for your kid’s baseball team?
00;35;29;13 – 00;35;54;11
Unknown
I can’t, but actually she donated a lot of money to the team. And she’s teaching them how to be fundraisers. So I get it. But still she’s a multimillionaire. She just suck it up and just fun the team. Just like, how much money does a baseball team need, right? I mean, this is for, like, a trip somewhere. I think they’re going to the Baseball Hall of Fame or some stuff.
00;35;54;18 – 00;36;14;21
Unknown
Great. Get some bottles and cans. Baseball kids go to, I don’t know, freeze dried cat. Go. Your thoughts on that? Don’t think about it. Just answer. It’s hard for me because it’s an animal I know I did, so I, I did have a moment where I got very overemotional and I did not like that. Okay. You got overemotional?
00;36;14;21 – 00;36;35;20
Unknown
About what? The fact that the cat was freeze dried or the cat was dead. The cat was dead. Okay. And that we had to bring it back in. You didn’t like that. We had to bring it back in? No, because 1 or 2 motion, it’s too emotional. So when she says it’s on my bedside and I wake up to it and I just get to pet it and I’m like, no, that’s not not is not like that.
00;36;35;20 – 00;36;57;20
Unknown
You didn’t not that next level. Right? So you didn’t like what? You didn’t like the fact that we brought it back? Yeah. After it was dead. I don’t like the go. Me. Yeah. I didn’t like that she talked to it. I didn’t like that she pet it. Okay. What. What about the fact that it was in a separate box.
00;36;57;25 – 00;37;08;11
Unknown
And I’m like that part. I didn’t like how much she paid for this experience. Okay. Did you like anything about it.
00;37;08;14 – 00;37;34;15
Unknown
Get to get to see those toe beans the rest of your life. Oh, Toby. My. Yeah, that’s what was there. These are the toe beans. That’s the part of the plot. These are the toe beans. Okay, just learn something else from the glossary of Rebecca’s. So it’s. I am very emotionally attached to my cat. It will not be a good day.
00;37;35;25 – 00;38;03;16
Unknown
I’m aware I get it. But, I will not go so far as to stuff it, bring it back into my home. Your level of control right now and how you’re having this conversation is unfucking real. As I get real, what is going on for you? What feelings are coming up in your body when you are, when you are watching that video, tell our listeners they deserve to hear deserve this.
00;38;03;21 – 00;38;29;06
Unknown
It’s too weird. I can’t hear the emotional component when she when she went through the emotional journey of choosing to honor her cat in some capacity, and then it coming back to her and getting getting the heartfelt like getting a cremated animal, you know? Yes. But then we open it and we have the freeze dried cat. It’s just too much.
00;38;29;09 – 00;38;43;17
Unknown
It’s too much. I didn’t like that. That heart was in a box. Where should it be? I didn’t I don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see the fact that it’s an I don’t I don’t want anything to do with that heart. And I don’t want that heart to come back to me. So I found myself fascinated.
00;38;43;17 – 00;38;58;01
Unknown
Yeah. Why would she have the other organs? And then what do you do with it? I don’t know, right. So that was that. I had a reaction to that. I also had a reaction to the fact that the freeze dried cat was in packing peanuts. Yes. And so I thought to myself, we can do better than that. We we can.
00;38;58;03 – 00;39;24;23
Unknown
If I’m getting my animal back, I’m going to expect that it’s going to be in something that feels more preserving of who my cat is, like in The Last coffin or not. But I put it on a cat bed, you know, or like, make it something that feels like it wasn’t just a freeze dried cat thrown into a box with some packing peanuts like you got from Amazon.
00;39;24;25 – 00;39;49;11
Unknown
Yeah, I need it to have. I didn’t buy textbooks, you know, like, I need to take a little more. More like. Yeah. Kindness. Okay. Associated with I can I can see that I it’s like a trophy. Yeah. Yeah. It’s no longer a being that you loved. It’s a keepsake. It’s like now I was about to make a reference and I’m choosing to not.
00;39;49;16 – 00;40;05;28
Unknown
Okay. All right, I’ll tell you after. Okay. I’m going to let you not do that because I can only imagine what it is I’m going to choose to keep to myself. I push you for it. That’s the whole thing’s going down. I’m going to keep it to myself. And if you, join the more love, subscription, even more love.
00;40;06;01 – 00;40;27;19
Unknown
Yeah. I’m still not sure you’re going to hear about it. Not sharing anything for a price. No, you’re going to get it in the, the after reels. Yeah, yeah, yeah. so I had a reaction to that. I did appreciate that the ears were further supported by a little extra bubble wrap, and I appreciated that because that was I couldn’t.
00;40;27;19 – 00;40;49;02
Unknown
Yeah, I thought it was, here. No, it was bubble wrap. So let’s head out my glasses to see. And I couldn’t see. I thought it was great ears. No, no normal black ears. Just bubble wrap. But I appreciate that because again, I don’t want to get my animal in one of its half. Its ears fall off when she said she put it in the dryer was it like a tumbling dryer?
00;40;49;02 – 00;41;06;07
Unknown
Now, I had a reaction to that too. I don’t need to know the process. for me, I don’t need to know the details about what we did with the organs or those types of things. I just need to know that I now have this animal that was my my animal, you know? Right. I have a question. Who’s the person?
00;41;06;09 – 00;41;36;09
Unknown
One that figured out you can do this? And two, decided to make business out of it. Isn’t that kind of weird? How did they know to say no? Absolutely. I’ll say now. Oh, it is weird, Scott. So it’s not weird. What’s weird about it? I have a feeling about stuffing any kind of animal, so it’s weird to me, even though they say they say they specifically made a point to say it’s not taxidermy, right?
00;41;36;09 – 00;42;03;14
Unknown
Because it’s very striking. Which is implying in my mind, implying that taxidermy is less taxidermy is a beneath this process. It’s not as, they didn’t skin the cat even used the word skinned, which is right. So it’s more humane. That’s not dead. Does it matter? Yeah. No. So I could just throw use a dryer until it dries and they put it in the position like it was was.
00;42;03;21 – 00;42;38;13
Unknown
Okay, you go for it. I did a research project in my PhD program. here she goes for, qualitative in the PhD in psychology. And because she dated a man that on the taxidermy. Yeah. Tannery. The tannery, you get stuffed every. So I had to go and learn about something that I knew absolutely nothing about through the sequence of five, six different interviews sessions.
00;42;38;15 – 00;43;08;25
Unknown
So I picked Cantrell Taxidermy, and I went and I sat with him for hours and watched him do taxa dummy. And the research findings that came out of this was how much taxidermists really appreciate and value animals, how much they, he showed me the process of the skinning. In fact, the title of my research was called Getting All the Chunks Out.
00;43;09;07 – 00;44;00;11
Unknown
the Art of taxidermy. And he talked at great length about the expertise that’s needed and that the goal of taxidermy is to be able to preserve the looks of that particular animal so that you can continue to relive that memory, that excitement, that whatever. So I noticed when she was talking about the freeze dried process versus the taxidermy process, that it it was surprising to me that we would even need to distinguish between that, because I can see the process of taxidermy being that you have to essentially skin the cat, literally, and then put it on a form, and the form might or might not look the way that you want your cat to
00;44;00;11 – 00;44;28;13
Unknown
look. Whereas the freeze dried process is essentially, it sounds like the entirety of the cat minus its organs, and it might be more realistic looking because you haven’t had to go through the process of skinning it, putting fake eyes on it, you know, all of that stuff. So I didn’t find myself bothered at all about that process, except for the fact that I was like, we don’t really need to create a distinction between those two.
00;44;28;13 – 00;45;00;10
Unknown
There are two very different art forms, but I’m surprised to hear that you guys would think that there was something weird or like, not normal or confusing about is it why someone would want that? Or is it the actual process or what? What is it? Well, I never heard of freestyling before. Yeah. Me neither. And I frankly, I equate taxidermy with trophy.
00;45;00;12 – 00;45;16;18
Unknown
They’re not I don’t yeah, I think so. Catches a fish or they got a bear or something. Yes. You don’t, you don’t. Yeah. It’s not like my lab died. So I’m going to bring it to a taxidermist sometimes. I’m sure I’ve heard, but I don’t think I don’t think that’s the norm is what I’m saying. I think it’s a with trophy.
00;45;16;21 – 00;45;33;15
Unknown
You shoot a deer, you want the head mounted because it’s a trophy. Like a bad ass, right? But, Erin, as a psychologist, wouldn’t you say that that’s kind of a problem for people unable to let go of their pet, so they have to have it stuffed and sitting in their living room with them and interact with it the way she did.
00;45;33;15 – 00;46;05;25
Unknown
That’s the part I to talk to. The interact like that. Is that healthy? So I think that when we get into the discussion, that’s how I personally feel about what is normal and what is abnormal. We’re actually denying people the opportunity to respond in a way that feels authentic to them. Now, are there times where that is going to go too far and where we’re going to need to have some type of psychological intervention?
00;46;05;25 – 00;46;39;03
Unknown
Because let’s say, we’ve been unable to detach from the fact that this is not a real animal. Right. Or it’s gone past the point of just being comfort. It’s moved more on to more of a psychological. Oddity. Like I’ve been somewhere filling the bowl full of food rotting. Correct. So it’s not for me the the process of how people grieve.
00;46;39;03 – 00;47;04;01
Unknown
In this case, it’s about the lengths to which they participate and have awareness of the way they’re participating in this grief process. So I think you just gave a great example, Scott, if this woman now is treating this life a life like a life cat, it’s eating it is walking it over to the water dish is putting it right research to do those things.
00;47;04;01 – 00;47;29;00
Unknown
If people come over to this woman’s house and she’s like, oh, did you see so-and-so say hello to so-and-so, right? Right. Versus it just sitting next to her on the bed? Yes. For me, my response to that, though, which is different, I’m hearing is not, oh my God, that’s so weird. Okay. This is not okay. My response to that is okay, this is extreme pain and grief, and we need to try and reel this back in.
00;47;29;00 – 00;47;49;27
Unknown
We need to we need to do what we need to do to get this person on a healthier track. They have disassociated from the reality of this. So it’s not as clear cut to answer your questions, Scott, to me as what is normal? Grieving? What is not normal grieving? Because I think grief just looks the way grief looks.
00;47;50;16 – 00;48;11;06
Unknown
but there is some lines or some experiences that feel more extreme to me that then are a clue to me in this field that we need to help people come back to a healthier place of relatability. With that.
00;48;11;09 – 00;48;36;23
Unknown
I would agree, you guys are hilarious. Where’s my cricket button? If you guys are holy, I would just keep coming back to emotional intelligence. I. I respect that whole dissertation that you blessed us with. There’s nothing. No, I, I don’t think of that when when you show me the video, I’m thinking that’s weird. Like, because I wouldn’t do that.
00;48;37;22 – 00;48;57;28
Unknown
but I don’t think of it as well. That person is going through grief. And how can I help them? So if you you’re a helper, you want to figure out how can I get this person past this problem where I’m just like, I see the problem. I’m moving on. Thank you. Ma’am. You know, so I mean, kudos to you for that.
00;48;58;03 – 00;49;22;09
Unknown
So this is Rebecca and I had this session before the session today. It was just something pretty similar to this. And that’s what I want to help understand more is I believe when people have a stark reaction about that’s not normal or that is weird or that is not okay, that we’ve won denied ourself of an opportunity to really understand that person’s true experience.
00;49;22;09 – 00;50;00;09
Unknown
But two, we’re not really paying attention to why our defense mechanisms are in place that are causing us to have that reaction. So that’s what’s interesting to me always about people, anyone having a really stark reaction to, oh my gosh, that’s so odd, or oh my gosh, that, that is not okay. Right. And to immediately shut it down and I don’t know if this is my training or if this is just my personality or whatever, but I, I honestly cannot think of a lot of things in life that I would immediately put into a category of, wow, this, this is not okay.
00;50;00;16 – 00;50;21;12
Unknown
This is still wow, that is really frickin weird. Now, I might have some reactions immediately that I’m like, interesting. Okay, I’m finding myself very curious about that, right? I had a reaction when she put the cat on the nightstand and started talking to it. My reaction wasn’t, what the hell are you doing? Right? My reaction was, okay, that that’s not good.
00;50;21;14 – 00;50;47;16
Unknown
Okay, that that might not be okay. But then immediately I went to well, maybe she’s just doing that for the video. Maybe she’s just doing that for the camera. Maybe she’s just, you know, trying to showcase could be true. We don’t know, right? We don’t know her. It kind of felt like guesses, but it’s giving people the benefit of the doubt before going to a place of complete judgment and right off, if you will, about and so.
00;50;47;16 – 00;51;10;11
Unknown
Well, clearly people supported her because she did a go fund me. Yeah. Looks like her community, her community was all in right. If nobody gave her money, they would. That would speak volumes to me. Yes. And I find the fact that people supported and gave money to it to be really interesting as well, because I’m curious about how that came to be.
00;51;10;11 – 00;51;29;05
Unknown
Correct. Because I there’s got to be a back story. Yes. And so again, it’s approaching it from this place of curiosity that I’m like, oh, wow, she was able to raise money. Tell me more about that. Right. But I don’t think if if we aren’t approaching those types of conversations from a tell me more about that. That’s really interesting.
00;51;29;05 – 00;51;46;12
Unknown
Wow. I find that fascinating. I’m having a reaction to that. Where is that coming up? Is that my stuff or is that her stuff? If we’re not doing that, then I think were denying ourselves an opportunity to look further into something which, as we discussed in the car, may be the exact reason why we’re doing that. And in some ways I think that’s okay too.
00;51;46;13 – 00;52;11;04
Unknown
Right? So in the car we were talking about how Rebecca was shut it down real quick just by being like, that’s weird. I don’t like that. All done not having a conversation about that. And I’m actually okay with that so long as the next statement is, I shut that down real quick, because that is so odd for me that a lot of feelings came up for me, that I don’t want to talk about it, because I just don’t even want to go to that place.
00;52;11;22 – 00;52;31;28
Unknown
it’s that level of like acknowledgment that that’s why we’re doing the thing that we’re doing that I can hang with all day. It’s when people have their immediate, you know, stark. That’s weird. Your weird. Why are you doing that reaction with no acknowledgment of what’s coming up for them that I’m like, I get angry or I’m like, why are we doing that?
00;52;31;29 – 00;53;02;07
Unknown
Why we have to do that to people like, I don’t? Life is not that. And this is going to sound real ironic coming from me. Clear cut, definitive, specific. Right now, I’m not the expert on this. I’m totally open to hearing both you and Scott difference of opinion on that. But I’m curious because I do think that the reactions you guys are having is a much more normal, usual reaction that people would have.
00;53;02;09 – 00;53;27;07
Unknown
I think we just I because I’m trying to I’m trying to think of a way to articulate something that that makes sense or I don’t know how to articulate this. I think that at the end of the day, I don’t I don’t know how to say this. The only, the only thing you can keep coming up with is I like the idea of being exclusive and being.
00;53;27;09 – 00;53;52;28
Unknown
Tight knit and I don’t know, I’m not I’m not a open arm. Embrace it all. Come as you are type of person I don’t. I believe in the idea of having exclusivity. I like that idea of only certain people can be involved in. There are only certain people. People get together in these like minded groups because of X, Y and z.
00;53;53;01 – 00;54;18;08
Unknown
I don’t know how to articulate that in a way that doesn’t sound mean or. Closed off. It’s not about that. It’s about not everybody can get into the sorority. Right? Like. And why? Why is that? Right. So I think it’s okay to have an opinion or have feeling about somebody and just be like, you. Do you? That’s great.
00;54;18;11 – 00;54;38;17
Unknown
I’m not going to contribute to that. Go fund me. But no, I’m okay with that too. You can because that’s because I wouldn’t I wouldn’t have contributed to that. Go fund me. Right. That doesn’t speak to me, but it’s more about if we have that reaction of, oh my God, that’s so weird, why the hell is she doing something like that?
00;54;38;18 – 00;54;59;00
Unknown
And I just cannot. Okay. Why is she being like that? Do you think that that is a healthy place for the person who’s saying that to be, as well as the healthy place for what we want this world to be, is the haves and the have nots, the do’s and don’ts, the. That’s weird and that’s not weird that that level of definitive ness.
00;54;59;05 – 00;55;18;22
Unknown
I’m okay with that, though. I’m okay with with that split. I think for me it’s the action. If if I think that a person doing that is weird, that’s, you know, that’s my prerogative. I’m, I’m I can think that’s weird. However, I’m not going to go out of my way or I’m not going to do something to put them on blast.
00;55;18;26 – 00;55;37;15
Unknown
Yeah, I’m not going to go ridicule them or, you know, do something to hurt them because I don’t think I will think to myself, that’s weird. And then never go to them and say, you’re frickin nuts, dude. I would just be like, oh yeah, okay, cool. And I and I certainly wouldn’t approach it from curiosity. I want to be like, let me know more.
00;55;37;16 – 00;56;01;17
Unknown
Yeah, it’s I don’t care. I’m like, this is weird. Moving on. I mean, once again, I, I’m right here in the middle. I know I can see, I can see both hundred percent. I can see her point of view too. I’m just I’m not as thoughtful as Aaron. Oh, great. Don’t I don’t think about how can I help this person from where they are in this whole situation.
00;56;01;17 – 00;56;21;24
Unknown
I just think that’s weird. Okay. Moving on. Right. But I can and maybe it is your training. Maybe it is because you come from that background. You spent a lot of time there and you know, you’re profession is to get to know people and to help guide and ask the questions and to really get to the core of what they’re experiencing.
00;56;21;24 – 00;56;36;04
Unknown
So it all makes sense to me. I don’t think that that’s a natural tendency. It might be for some people. Right. But I’m thinking, was that a belch? It was good for you deep down.
00;56;36;06 – 00;57;09;16
Unknown
I don’t know, I think that’s really interesting because I, I’m not saying that I want to have a full blown conversation with this woman to try and figure out who she is and what her what her grief was and what I I’m not interested in being this woman’s therapist. Right. But just the process of watching the video to me suggests that, you know, if we’re looking at it with a frame on it, that and correct me if I’m wrong about it, I don’t want to put you in the wrong category here, but as you’re watching that, you immediately have this lens on.
00;57;09;17 – 00;57;41;11
Unknown
That’s like weird, uncomfortable. Why not? Okay, oh my gosh, gofund me. Not acceptable. And then and then move on. Well, I don’t know if any of if all those words were accurate. because there was an emotional component for sure. For me, at least for me, I was that it was more of a definitive judgment. Right? It was more so if we used the lens of definitive opinionated versus my lens was more, oh, interesting and curious.
00;57;41;17 – 00;57;59;08
Unknown
No, I don’t think anything’s definitive. I think it was. I didn’t think less of her in any way. Right. I just thought that that it was it was weird. And it’s not something I would do. But I didn’t think. But I can understand as a grieving person or something like that. I was just like, wow. And that’s not something I would do, right?
00;57;59;10 – 00;58;15;14
Unknown
And it’s weird. And you do you do her own. Very. So I felt the same way you guys did, except for the weird component. you didn’t think it was weird? Oh, you didn’t see it that way. You said curious. I didn’t I don’t really have a judgment on if it was weird or not. I found myself curious about it.
00;58;15;14 – 00;58;33;27
Unknown
Okay. Right. So the word weird versus the word curious for me is the difference. Because I also would not freeze dry my cat, I. That is also not a way that I would grieve, right? I don’t want to receive Sullivan’s heart in a box, you know, like, so. But so what a Nirvana song. Yeah. My heart in a box.
00;58;34;17 – 00;58;55;21
Unknown
so what’s interesting is I’m having the same reaction that you guys are all in complete agreement that we’re not. We’re not getting our caps freeze dry at any time soon, nor taxidermied. Right. We’ve we’re all clear about that. It’s just it’s just the, and for me, when I say that’s weird, it’s because that’s too emotional. That’s what’s weird about it.
00;58;55;21 – 00;59;22;29
Unknown
Interesting. Way too emotional. You know what else is really interesting? Our hamster died yesterday. Oh. Oh. That’s sad, you know, and send it out, you know, just throw him out. It’s okay. I mean, we buried the last couple. Are you, like, put them in the trash? Just do strip. Yeah, I came home and so we wrote words. Paws in the air.
00;59;23;05 – 00;59;40;19
Unknown
Kelly came home. Abby was, Abby was upset. Or she called her because she was upset that that the the hamster died doesn’t have a name. So, Angel was. That was the name of the hamster? It was a little tiny thing. So cute. And I’m not, I’m not a rodent, dude, I don’t like rye. I don’t care for rodents too much, but.
00;59;40;20 – 01;00;03;20
Unknown
Okay. This was very cuddly. Little. It loved her. I don’t know, weird, but, she was upset. And so Kelly immediately went out and bought another one. Oh, and came back with this hamster. Before Abby even knew that that was happening, she just came and said, here, here’s another hamster, okay? And took the other hamster and just threw it in the trash, okay?
01;00;03;20 – 01;00;20;16
Unknown
Because I came home later, found out the whole story, and then she’s like, yeah, can you put the trash out? Because that’s going to start to stink. I’m like, what? What? And I just threw it in the trash. I’m like, oh my God, okay, how insensitive can you be? Okay, so you didn’t have any desire to take it out and give it a proper burial?
01;00;20;19 – 01;00;45;14
Unknown
I didn’t want to take it out of the trash. Why are we trying to get a new hamster to pass this angel? No no no no no, it was a it was a. You’re sad. Let me make it better immediately. Yes, yes, I know she can’t, so I. We don’t have enough time to process all this. I have so many questions associated with us.
01;00;45;14 – 01;01;02;02
Unknown
So we have stay tuned. We have a complete we’ve just watched about a freeze dried cat, and we went into all the different feelings and thoughts associated with it. And then your example is we throw Angel right into the trash can. And we didn’t want anyone to feel any feelings about it. So we went and bought another one.
01;01;02;08 – 01;01;25;29
Unknown
We I was not involved in any part of that transaction to open the trash can. Here we go. Angel food. Oh my. My reaction was you just threw her away. Yeah, I went and buried the bird. I went and buried three different hamsters. We got little crosses out there. We said a prayer. Wow. Oh, yeah. We pay. We pay respects to our pets.
01;01;26;00 – 01;01;44;10
Unknown
Not for Angel. There’s no angel. God, Abernathy. Look at that. B, we’ve done with her. Like to fly up to the heavens. I have my limits. And my limit is I’m not going to go into the trash where my wife has already thrown out a dead hamster. Dig it out, and then go dig a hole and bury it in the snow.
01;01;45;02 – 01;01;52;12
Unknown
That’s where I draw the wire. You could have set the whole bag on fire.
01;01;52;14 – 01;02;13;12
Unknown
I got to talk about that and I’ll put it on your porch and you come down to stop it out. No. Yeah. Wait till it goes down to ashes and then bear the ashes I loved that. Me too. Isn’t empathy amazing? Well, we’re amazing. I don’t know about all that sympathy stuff. That’s fine. I accept you wherever you are.
01;02;13;19 – 01;02;37;15
Unknown
Oh, God, I love you. I love you too. And if you love us, please like and subscribe to more. Love the power of Empathy podcast wherever you get your podcasts. See you next time.
