Episode 120 – Girl’s All Done.

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Dumpster fire. Erin’s life is in the gutter so it’s Rebecca’s turn to carry the weight of the show. Strap in, folks cause Erin’s energy is NOT okay during this episode. After a tarot reading about ‘purple scales’ (was anyone paying attention to the real message?) and some “Mama Medium” talk the heart of the matter comes out – when you’re an authentic person who’s really struggling, it’s super hard to talk about anything else of substance. The weight of carrying the energy-load can be really heavy sometimes. Can you relate?

0:00:09 – Speaker 1
Hey, it’s me, Erin. Thanks for joining us on the More Love podcast. Do not tell Rebecca, but this podcast is about empathy. She likes people to think she’s dead inside, but the truth is she’s a big time feeler who has truly helped me uncover that empathy is my superpower. Here she comes.
0:00:28 – Speaker 2
Hey, Bestie, Hi love.
0:00:30 – Speaker 1
What are you doing? Oh, just getting ready to host a podcast. A podcast About what Life? Our life as best friends who are more like sisters. Yay, I love us and I can’t wait to share our stories with the world, especially the ones that involve us pushing each other right To be our most authentic selves. Oh man, okay, let’s see how many ways I can tell you what we’re talking about today.
0:01:00 – Speaker 3
Number one Turn it on like a light switch.
0:01:05 – Speaker 1
Number two when I just went to the McDonald’s drive-through, what did I tell you to do if I started choking on a chicken nugget? Let you go, let me go. I said if you intervene with my time, I’m gonna have a real big problem, right, mm-hmm? Number three Maybe we better take a quick break. You think let’s take a moment to thank our sponsor, concern Center. Ooh, we like them.
They’re rethinking how we connect people to resources and support to live happy, fulfilling lives. Sounds a lot like our podcast. Don’t push it. You know, rebecca. Every organization has people that need help finding support Students, employees, patients. I don’t need help with patients, patients. Concern Centers help 3.5 million people find support nationwide, with more becoming a part of it every day. That sounds a lot like our podcast. I just said that the more love podcast is all about people connecting with each other. So if you or someone you know is involved in a university, a company, a health system, any frickin organization that needs some help to connect people with their resources they need, please reach out to connection at Concern Center dot com. Help us get connected, everyone get connected with the help that they need. Well said so, what were we talking about before?
0:02:25 – Speaker 3
Turn it on like a light switch.
0:02:29 – Speaker 2
I think you should just do the whole thing back and forth with your own voices.
0:02:31 – Speaker 1
Yeah, this is the sign for all done.
0:02:35 – Speaker 3
But that was like spirit fingers or jazz hands or something.
0:02:38 – Speaker 2
All done, All done, I’m all done. Well, you know, I was just. I was going to open the podcast by saying you were. Hey, that picture of us sitting on the moon was in the chair at Ripley’s, believe it or not, right after I stood next to the tallest man in the world. Yes, Do you remember that picture?
0:02:55 – Speaker 1
Yes, and what height were you at? Crotch height, crotch height. And what did I say to you?
0:03:00 – Speaker 2
I said turn around, yeah, you were taking my picture. And then I was smiling at the camera and you’re like no, I think it’d be better if you don’t look at the camera. And I turned right around yeah, because I had no idea. Crotch height.
0:03:10 – Speaker 1
So there I have a picture of you standing in crotch height with the tallest man in the world and you completely oblivious about what’s happening.
0:03:16 – Speaker 2
So, yeah, he had a good time though. Yeah, oh, I’m sure he did. That was right after we saw ugly.
0:03:21 – Speaker 1
Betty. Oh yeah yeah, but it wasn’t really ugly Betty, it was just a person who looked like ugly Betty, and I have a picture of Rebecca going smiling so that I could get her picture in the background. Yeah, yeah, it’s fine. So that’s my way of saying I don’t care what we talk about today, but it is nothing personal, nothing of any substance. Substance, no whatsoever, that’s my favorite. That’s my favorite podcast. Congratulations.
0:03:50 – Speaker 2
Really happy. Thank you, I am all done. I’m now taken over.
0:03:53 – Speaker 1
I’m all done. All right people listen up.
0:03:55 – Speaker 2
Here we go.
0:03:57 – Speaker 1
Here we go, guys. This is what you get.
0:03:59 – Speaker 2
What are we doing today? I can’t wait. What are we going to talk about today? I don’t think I should talk about the meme I sent you this morning.
0:04:05 – Speaker 1
Oh, I actually think you should, because it’s hilarious and it’s very characteristic of your personality. So I was.
0:04:12 – Speaker 2
I don’t know what I was doing, who the hell knows and it must have come up on my Instagram and it was said how parents discipline their disabled children. And I was like what? So I clicked it open and it was this mom disciplining her daughter, who was probably nine my daughter’s age and she was in a wheelchair. And the mother said so, and so you’re grounded. And the little girl said you can’t ground me, what are you going to do? And the mom took the wheels off the wheelchair.
0:04:44 – Speaker 1
The wheels right off the wheelchair and the next thing you know is her walking away with the wheels literally stuck in the chair with no wheels on the ground and I was 100%.
0:04:54 – Speaker 2
That’s what I would do.
0:04:55 – Speaker 1
That’s exactly what I would do. You want to run your mouth? Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, you want to run it? This is where we’re at.
0:05:01 – Speaker 2
Yeah, yeah absolutely I thought it was great. Yeah, I thought it was great. And then I kept watching it and the guy who had posted it gave his face and his face was like that’s not okay.
0:05:13 – Speaker 1
So he had empathy. Was it empathy or just complete shock that? Someone would I mean the kid must have done something pretty bad to deserve that, yeah great, that was a good start.
0:05:22 – Speaker 2
0:05:22 – Speaker 1
else do you want to talk about today?
0:05:23 – Speaker 2
Let’s just, you know, take the first card of our tarot card. Oh, okay, just take it right off the top and you can decide if it relates to your life. Yeah, okay, you’re ready. We’re going to turn it off. I don’t know what. If it’s a good thing, still turn it off.
0:05:37 – Speaker 1
I’m not here for any positive negative. I want to hear. No energy right now. None, none, I’m all done. Dead inside Numb Well, we’re still going to do it, all set.
0:05:51 – Speaker 3
Yeah ready.
0:05:52 – Speaker 1
Yeah, what’s that? It says hope, good that’s great.
0:05:58 – Speaker 2
Did you not remember 10 seconds ago when I said it’s this card, yeah, whatever it is, yeah great. It’s the star Good and it says hope, stop being nasty. Great, this is hope.
0:06:08 – Speaker 1
Oh my God, tell me more. Okay, good, tell me more about it.
0:06:11 – Speaker 2
It’s when you switch your attitude, it’s much more public what is? It. Okay, hold on, there we go. Hope is a good thing.
0:06:20 – Speaker 1
Oh, thank you, Thank you. Can I feel that in every fiber of my being?
0:06:25 – Speaker 2
I mean.
0:06:26 – Speaker 1
I don’t have my oil on yet.
0:06:28 – Speaker 2
No, because we can’t. We’re not ready for the oil.
0:06:30 – Speaker 1
Did you pick an oil? I sure did Good. Can’t wait to see what that one is.
0:06:34 – Speaker 3
I feel like you’re going to use motor oil today, based on her black heart. Yeah, something like SAE 30.
0:06:41 – Speaker 1
This is the other side of empathy. It’s called girls all done, girls all done.
0:06:46 – Speaker 2
Listen, this is really important for you to hear. Okay, great, can’t wait, then we won’t talk about it anymore. Good, the mermaid reaches for the. By the way people, in case you haven’t noticed, I did have to switch to my mermaid cards because I officially can’t read those other ones. This is much bigger.
Okay, the mermaid reaches for a shining star in the horizon of the ocean, a symbol of hope, healing and renewal. The mermaid scales are purple, which symbolizes intuition. The seaweed and water represent old emotions in the past, and their green color signifies healing and the heart chakra. Hmm, the oil I picked today is the green heart chakra oil. The pentagram beside her signifies spiritual protection. You have worked through heartache and conflict, understood the lessons of these difficult experiences and now are beginning to feel hope again. The more you place your trust in the universe to protect you, the more the star guides you towards happier times. I know you so well that you are 100% not listening to me, because if you are, you would be crying your eyes out, so you literally have turned it off. Back to the card. What did I just?
say you know about purple scales. Yeah, okay. The card therefore reveals personal growth. Are you tuned back in?
0:08:08 – Speaker 3
Oh, okay, you’re still out Okay.
0:08:10 – Speaker 2
The card therefore reveals a personal growth. Through healing past issues, you can be free from old patterns of relating and fear, feel more whole and fulfilled in the future. The star also is the card of creativity and offers great reassurance that you’re on the right path.
0:08:27 – Speaker 1
That’s referring to your lanyards that we talked about this morning. Yeah, yeah. Why don’t you tell people about the lanyards when you’re done with this?
0:08:34 – Speaker 2
Okay, so if you have been conflicted, suffering or doubting your abilities, the star in your reading is a sure shine, Sure shine that everything will be fine.
0:08:44 – Speaker 1
A sure shine way, sure, sure.
0:08:45 – Speaker 2
Everything’s going to be fine, great. Follow your heart and respect your inner knowing and trust that the universe will bring you whatever you need. Now I need to say, scott, that card’s for you. Nope, it’s not. I need to say something. I’m not sure if on the last podcast, we talked about her leg and the oh we did about trapped emotions in your body, and so you continue to go to the chiropractor and you heard some things about maybe your shoes were wrong, blah, blah, blah, but reality is it was a trapped emotion, and then you promptly called me and we did some readings. That also signified everything. Now, to be real clear, the cards you picked were wrong, but the cards I picked were dead, dead nuts on. So is this one?
0:09:31 – Speaker 1
I picked bad cards. I think it was the it wasn’t I was channeling concern center in my cards, correct?
0:09:38 – Speaker 2
You weren’t channeling what should have been concern, what you should have been. You weren’t asking the right question. So when I dared to ask the right question and then picked the card, Yep.
0:09:49 – Speaker 1
So and then what happened? We confirmed I’m a witch, we confirmed you’re a witch and also the pain went away. My leg started to dissipate and I woke up the next day without the same level of pain.
0:10:07 – Speaker 2
So so, basically, what we’re saying is the pendulum in the cards. You just always need to ask them.
0:10:13 – Speaker 1
That is the answer.
0:10:15 – Speaker 2
You can tell how desperate I was for answers as I said get out the card. I know Now if you want to believe it or choose to go with any of the vice or whatever, that’s up to you.
0:10:27 – Speaker 1
But it’s not up to me because she doesn’t let me make my own opinions. But the rest of you listeners are welcome to choose if you’d like to follow the advice. But that’s not how that works for me. Kind of like how I want to take a marketing initiative and move it forward and you tell me we’re not doing that.
0:10:45 – Speaker 2
In fact, let’s ask the pendulum Pudgeline Was Aaron’s marketing idea a good one?
0:10:53 – Speaker 1
What’s that mean?
0:10:54 – Speaker 2
It’s a big ass circle. It means no Whatever.
0:10:58 – Speaker 1
0:10:58 – Speaker 2
Do you see that?
0:11:00 – Speaker 1
I do see it. Let me hold it, ok. I swear to God, if this thing starts to circle, I’m going to cross it across the room, Can’t put it on the gems.
0:11:07 – Speaker 2
Oh why? Because it might read the energy of the gems.
0:11:09 – Speaker 1
Oh, that probably will happen. You got to watch out for that. The gem energy this is what you’re waiting for.
0:11:15 – Speaker 3
Scott is me holding it.
0:11:17 – Speaker 1
Ask it Was my marketing idea.
0:11:19 – Speaker 3
good, Looks like it’s up and down to me.
0:11:24 – Speaker 2
Back and forth. I can’t see that far. I don’t have my glasses. What’s it doing? Is it circling, or back and forth? Back and forth.
0:11:29 – Speaker 3
I was doing back and forth.
0:11:31 – Speaker 1
Are you just protecting my feelings? Oh, it’s going so hard back and forth. Yes, right now.
0:11:38 – Speaker 2
Thank you, pendulum, Wait, wait wait, pendulum, the spirit that is in the room. Is it just Aaron’s guide? Look at it. That means yes, it is, I know. But what guide he heard in the room? My guides are mean.
0:11:56 – Speaker 1
We talked about this Is Aaron, a disaster mess.
0:12:00 – Speaker 2
Yeah, it sure is. Is Rebecca nailing it at life? Is it circling?
0:12:08 – Speaker 1
It’s saying, no, this is fun, this is fun, scott. Scott. Ask him a question, ask him something, scott.
0:12:17 – Speaker 3
I don’t want to ask. I feel bad About what.
0:12:21 – Speaker 1
I don’t know, he has a question what does he feel bad about? All right, I’ll ask a question, Like against your religious affiliation or like what’s happening.
0:12:28 – Speaker 2
No, he doesn’t want to know the answer. If the spirit guide’s in the room say something that’s offensive, Do you think Scott’s spirit guide’s in the room? Oh, that’s a good question. Is Scott’s spirit guide in this room?
0:12:38 – Speaker 1
No, Is it in his little cubby hole in the other office? Oh my god, I said yes, look at it.
0:12:46 – Speaker 3
0:12:47 – Speaker 2
I mean you can’t talk to you.
0:12:48 – Speaker 1
You can’t talk, scott. It can’t be like it’s in the corner.
0:12:53 – Speaker 3
You’re creeping me out.
0:12:55 – Speaker 2
I’m going to ask you Really you don’t like it. Oh, you don’t like this.
0:12:57 – Speaker 1
Why not?
0:13:00 – Speaker 3
It’s a long story.
0:13:02 – Speaker 1
Oh my god, we have time today, just when I’m talking about anything of importance.
0:13:05 – Speaker 3
Remember when I told you I had, did I tell you I had mama medium here?
0:13:09 – Speaker 1
Yes, Mark, ok, here it is Today, thank you, for coming everyone. This is the story today. It’s Scott.
0:13:15 – Speaker 3
OK, this is really great. Please tell us about mama medium.
0:13:19 – Speaker 1
What does that mean and can we get in touch with her?
0:13:21 – Speaker 2
He said, yes, she used to live here, remember. Ok, remember, it was the man alcoholic.
0:13:25 – Speaker 1
What if we had to read the caputo? Oh, she’s next level, I know. Ok, please tell us about mama medium Scott.
0:13:35 – Speaker 3
She was here to record some voiceovers for a promo that they were doing for A&E, because they just recorded her last season. This was, I think it was shortly after I opened. Maybe I guess it was 2018 or maybe 2019. I don’t remember 2018. And when I had, I turned everything on. I was getting ready to record and then the lights started flickering and then all the screens went off, but everything was still on and I was like what the hell is going on? She’s like oh, that’s just my energy. And I’m like I’m like.
I’m like.
0:14:11 – Speaker 2
I know she didn’t mean her personal energy and then the energy she brought with her.
0:14:15 – Speaker 3
OK, well, she didn’t go into detail.
0:14:17 – Speaker 2
She’s not going to say that, because then they’re creepy Wow.
0:14:19 – Speaker 3
Well, I was like well, does your energy have a good credit rating? Just in case it ruins all my gear. But so that was the first time that she was here and then, after we recorded that and I was chatting with her a little bit, I asked her to come back and be on the podcast. So she came back again and she was on my podcast and right before that happened, the there was a person who was living next door to my house. He was like a handyman and he was living in this house doing work on on my neighbor’s house and my neighbor went away for like three months.
She went to Europe, so this guy was still living there. He was a raging alcoholic and she left him. He had no transportation, he had no money, I guess she just she left him with a house full of food. I don’t really know. I don’t know the whole. I don’t know the whole situation, but anyway he ended up hanging himself in the backyard right next to my house. Oh my God. And that is the second person in the last five years that has died in that house, because my neighbor before that there’s two elderly ladies the woman fell down the stairs in the middle of the night.
0:15:37 – Speaker 1
Oh, no, nope, Nope, I swear to God, is that your phone? I swear to God, I swear to God, is that Taylor? Not my phone, it’s your phone, it’s mine, oh, it’s mine. Oh, my God, you know who it is my chiropractor.
0:15:58 – Speaker 2
They’re back with another employment. Oh, it’s already taken care of.
0:16:01 – Speaker 1
Back to Scott. Oh, it’s fine, it’s fine if it’s hers. Scott is the star of the show today. Back to Scott. So you’re telling me that two people died, one who?
0:16:11 – Speaker 2
fell down the stairs.
0:16:14 – Speaker 3
No, no, no air quotes. She actually did fall down the stairs.
0:16:16 – Speaker 2
I know, but Rebecca did, she was pushed by spirit.
0:16:21 – Speaker 3
It was dark, she couldn’t see. She made a left instead of a right when she was in the middle, getting up in the middle of the night to use the potty.
0:16:28 – Speaker 1
Was she pushed by spirit?
0:16:31 – Speaker 2
Yeah, People, people don’t just fall and die, but so I come home from work. You done.
0:16:44 – Speaker 1
I’m sorry. I just had to make eye contact with. Rebecca because we both know about a story where someone did just accidentally fall.
0:16:52 – Speaker 3
Oh geez.
0:16:59 – Speaker 2
I have absolutely no idea.
0:17:03 – Speaker 3
What the hell is going on here.
0:17:05 – Speaker 2
I am not following. Wow, Okay, yeah, just go. So okay, I gotta think about that. Go ahead and keep going.
0:17:18 – Speaker 3
Now she gets it.
0:17:18 – Speaker 2
Now she gets it I can’t, I can’t tell that story, I can’t tell.
0:17:29 – Speaker 3
I can’t tell. My neighbor is going to text me. By the way, I think she’s giving massage at the moment. Shhh, Shhh, Shhh. We’re going to move you into the other studio if you’re going to be howling like that Holy Christmas Eve. But anyway, Mama Medium was here and I started telling her story and she kind of like picked up right away and started telling me what the guy was saying. Like the guy was there and he was talking to her and he was trying to communicate to her and he was saying he made a mistake and he’s sorry. And he kept saying, he kept repeating these numbers over and over and over again. I don’t know.
0:18:09 – Speaker 1
What are the numbers?
0:18:10 – Speaker 3
She couldn’t discern what they were. It was. I forget what it was. There’s a lot of re-numbers. Yeah, that’s what it was.
0:18:19 – Speaker 1
Oh boy.
0:18:23 – Speaker 3
But it was really weird and for a long time my neighbor, who still lives there, was telling me that she would see him. She’s like he’s visiting me and I’m like don’t tell me this shit.
0:18:34 – Speaker 1
Why you don’t like that? No, why not Because he was a creepy dude? Would it be fine if it was like someone? Nice, probably. Oh yeah, I tell spirit not to show themselves to me. I intentionally say to them do not show up here.
0:18:53 – Speaker 2
Oh speaking of, let’s talk about when we went on the ghost tour last year in New Orleans and they gave you the rods. Oh yeah, and in fact there was no volunteerism. It was you with the black shirt. Come here.
0:19:10 – Speaker 1
And it wasn’t what I meant to hold the rods.
0:19:12 – Speaker 2
They said you hold these rods and then you had to ask all the questions and then, rods and then it down board. Yep, we were so sure.
0:19:22 – Speaker 1
They were like ask it a question. This arm right now looks like a thing of Pillsbury dough. It’s incredible. What do you mean? How many like rolls there are?
0:19:35 – Speaker 2
It’s not rolls, it’s shadow. Is that what it is? It’s shadow from that.
0:19:41 – Speaker 1
It’s incredible. It’s like a whole.
0:19:43 – Speaker 2
It’s a shadow, it is not rolls.
0:19:45 – Speaker 3
We don’t see fat rolls in your arm.
0:19:46 – Speaker 1
You don’t? No, no, like this the whole time.
0:19:48 – Speaker 2
No, my arms up. It’s still there because it’s shadow. You still see it, it’s a shadow.
0:19:53 – Speaker 1
I’m going to put my coat on. Okay, that’s what I’m going to do. Put my coat on. Okay, it’s fine, scott, it’s fine.
0:20:03 – Speaker 2
So, anyway, are you guys punking me? I don’t. This is not a good day. It’s not good. I even offered her a cancel. She even asked me this morning Did I want to have the?
0:20:09 – Speaker 1
have a real podcast. Would you like me to cancel it? No, I asked you. If you want me to cancel it, I’m going to cancel it. I’m going to cancel it.
0:20:15 – Speaker 2
You said no, I like it. Do you want to?
0:20:17 – Speaker 1
still go to the podcast. I said, yeah, I’m in a really great place.
0:20:20 – Speaker 3
Then the day continued oh, yeah, I know, I know how those are. I’ve been having, I had a lot of those days recently. Today was kind of like half half one of those days.
0:20:31 – Speaker 1
0:20:32 – Speaker 3
I think. I think it’s the weather right now. I think the weather is getting to me.
0:20:38 – Speaker 1
There’s something messed up about the energy. Did you see the full moon?
0:20:43 – Speaker 3
No, the other night Holy crap, it was a Saturday night it was almost full. Saturday night it was pretty full yeah.
0:20:50 – Speaker 2
But did you see how close it was?
0:20:52 – Speaker 3
Yeah, it was huge.
0:20:53 – Speaker 2
It was huge, and so I thought, ooh, okay, maybe that’s what’s going on, could be. I mean, we could be in retrograde. What do they call it?
0:21:01 – Speaker 1
Mercury, mercury, mercury’s in retrograde. I thought it was out of that.
0:21:05 – Speaker 3
I thought that we’ve moved on from that. I don’t follow that stuff. I don’t even know what that means, I don’t either, but I know that’s a little too, much for you, I mean no, it’s too hard
0:21:11 – Speaker 2
for my brain, my mess of brain, what’s it called?
0:21:14 – Speaker 3
0:21:15 – Speaker 2
My men’s sees. Yeah, my men’s sees.
0:21:16 – Speaker 1
Call it the men’s sees thing. You mentioned her brain, because that really takes you up a notch. It’s too hard to comprehend. Yeah, so you just don’t bother with it See now, my coffee got cold. Why Is that Bob Ross yeah?
0:21:30 – Speaker 3
Because if it’s warm, you can see the painting that he’s Stop it. Oh, I love that. I love that.
0:21:38 – Speaker 1
I’d like to just draw attention to the fact that when Erin’s not on her game, how great the podcast is, everything falls apart.
0:21:44 – Speaker 3
Yeah, how great the podcast is.
0:21:48 – Speaker 1
You know, which really makes me feel like I have a place here. So, thank you, I really appreciate that, okay. Okay, here is the real problem. When there is a tremendous amount of things going on in your life that are like a great upheaval and you are someone who’s incredibly authentic and you have not spent the time or had the time really to wrap your mind around where you’re at and where you’re going, everything that comes out of your mouth is of no significance.
I don’t know if this happens to other people, but when you are like a truly authentic, honest person, when you’re off your game, when something really big is going on in your life and you don’t know if that’s something you can talk about or like how you want to practice you haven’t given yourself time for it then everything else sort of gets off kilter because you’re just so used to being open and honest about how you’re feeling Right, so I can start the conversation by saying I’m not in a good place, I’m having a really hard time. This is really difficult. And then, when you’re super authentic, you don’t know what to talk about after that, because everything you go to talk about just feels so genuinely inauthentic Because that’s not where your brain is right now. Yeah See, I’m so good at turning it off that it’s fine, right.
0:23:09 – Speaker 2
I’ll talk about anything all day long, because it’s just very it. Yeah, that’s the hard part right.
0:23:14 – Speaker 1
So I think that this you know, I operate constantly from a place of just to be where you are. I don’t do a good job stifling what I’m feeling. I don’t do a good job not talking about things that I’m feeling. I don’t do a good, I’m an overshadowing. You know, my friend, don, from my last place of employment, gave me this little block that said did I just overshare? Because I just constantly, I’m just talking about what’s going on for me, right, right. When you are at that bottom of that barrel and you’re really like, could this year hand me anything else, I seriously I’ve paid my dues this year, I’m all done. I really don’t, I’m all done. I really don’t want to have to feel my way through anything else in 2023. When that is your place, it’s really hard to talk about anything else because it’s almost like you’re holding this secret that it’s just going to come out.
0:24:16 – Speaker 2
You know, is the secret that you’re really looking forward to turning 42. Yes, After you yeah but yes, we’ll put it to bed. We’ll put 41 to bed 41 sucks.
0:24:28 – Speaker 1
I don’t feel like it’s a 41 problem. I think it’s a 2023 problem.
0:24:32 – Speaker 2
Yeah, but you were 41 in 2023.
0:24:34 – Speaker 1
Yeah, this is not a number, you know what we should do.
0:24:37 – Speaker 2
A number thing 41 plus 2023. What is that equal? Then you’d like subtract it at some shit. You probably squish it up in some rattle and then it spits out a number and it tells you something. I’m going to do that one when we get in the car. That’s good.
0:24:52 – Speaker 1
I’m sure that’s what it’s called.
0:24:55 – Speaker 2
I’m sure that’s going to be the answer. Yeah, would you shit your pants?
0:25:00 – Speaker 1
No, no, what You’re all in now. Yeah, it’s just par for the course. Par for the course.
0:25:07 – Speaker 2
I can relate to that with you specifically, because I think it’s very obvious when your energy is off not necessarily off to the point where people can tell if it’s a true crisis that you’re going through or if it’s you’re battling with emotions because somebody else is going through it’s just, it doesn’t matter what the answer or what the issue is, it’s just, it’s an energy thing, because you’re always channeling that emotion.
0:25:37 – Speaker 1
People feel that from me a lot Sure. What surprises me is I remember at my Memorial Day party you weren’t there at that one, but remember I was super overwhelmed because I was like I got to manage all this stuff and I’m not great about getting all the appetizers out in time and all of that stuff and I had a couple people come up to me and say is everything okay?
0:25:56 – Speaker 2
Is your energy okay, because they’re not used to you being like that Right.
0:26:01 – Speaker 1
But in my mind I’m just being present, you know, with where I’m at and I’m not usually in that place.
0:26:10 – Speaker 2
I’m genuinely. Usually you’re just the host. I’m doing all the things. I’m usually the one sitting back and having a cocktail and engaging socially, because I’m like I won’t talk to anybody, I will get all the things out of here. I’m going to put those cocktail weenies in the crack yeah In the crack yeah, that’s a really good point.
0:26:27 – Speaker 1
I think it’s interesting and I don’t, you know, should someone’s energy impact the mood to that degree? Right, because there’s a part of me that just wants to genuinely be where I’m at and to allow that to be where I’m at, but there’s another part of me that’s very clear that when I’m at that place it’s not good or healthy or comfortable or okay for a lot of other people around me. What’s the face You’re?
0:26:56 – Speaker 2
concerned about your level of energy being where it’s at and how it’s affecting someone else. Oh, I’m sorry, is it?
0:27:04 – Speaker 1
an empathy problem. Even even that, even when it might be lowest, low, I’m worried that maybe my empathy might be, or my energy might not be enough for people. I can’t, I have an illness. I have an illness.
0:27:16 – Speaker 2
I am so ill it’s okay for you not to always be that thing that you think you need to be.
0:27:26 – Speaker 1
I know, I know that, logically, I don’t know that, feeling wise, I’ve already convinced myself that we won’t be airing this podcast. Okay.
0:27:36 – Speaker 2
I think it’s very helpful for people.
0:27:38 – Speaker 1
Is that fascinating? What are you laughing at, Scott? No, but think about it. I can understand Scott said, Scott was like yeah, I’m aware we’re going to have to cut this one down a lot.
0:27:49 – Speaker 2
I can understand.
0:27:50 – Speaker 3
That’s so inauthentic.
0:27:51 – Speaker 2
Yeah right, I can understand that feeling. When it comes to your kid, right, because you don’t want to present or create fear or create whatever. But when it comes to other people, you can’t understand that I mean I can from your perspective because I know you so well. But I also feel very strongly that it’s okay for you to be not okay.
0:28:16 – Speaker 1
I think I’m not okay in very small, close-knit settings. Right, you and my closest people are very aware that this is not an okay time, but I feel like I have the responsibility to turn it on when other people are counting on that energy, that connection. People love this podcast. We get so many positive reviews about this podcast constantly throughout the course of the week.
0:28:48 – Speaker 3
So you have some kind of fatigue from having to carry it all the time, having to be the one who sets the ship in the right direction and keeps things moving. And now you’re just freaking. Tired of it.
0:29:05 – Speaker 1
You need a break and I think my perfectionism maybe comes into that as well that if I’m not the one who’s?
0:29:12 – Speaker 3
Yeah, because it’s at us. That doesn’t work. I have to be perfect. How can I be this way? I can’t blow up.
0:29:18 – Speaker 1
I get it Right. Or let’s use this podcast as an example. If I’m not on, we’ve wasted Scott’s time. If I’m not on, we’ve wasted the listener’s time. If I’m not on, people aren’t going to listen to the podcast anymore because they’re going to think this one was super boring and not great.
0:29:41 – Speaker 3
Well, you know what? There’s jokes on them because had they stuck around just a little longer? That’s where the meat for this episode was. Just, you had to get through the crap. It was like a ruse. It was like we’re not going to talk about anything. Watch them drop off. All right, now everybody’s gone. Let’s talk about the real shit.
0:30:01 – Speaker 1
Yeah, I mean, that’s how it happened, boy, isn’t that Rebecca? In a nutshell, you know, wait, honestly, I had to stick around for that ruse. For a real long time I was like I’m going to get to the good. I’m like there it is Some return on my investment.
0:30:17 – Speaker 3
It’s like waiting for that pair that never ripens, yeah Right.
0:30:22 – Speaker 2
You have the very smallest window. Yeah Right, the smallest window. Remember that movie, dennis the Menace, where he has that garden show and then the thing only opens for one minute and it’s like his treasured flower and then it’s like open and died and he was distracted and missed it.
0:30:42 – Speaker 1
Yeah, Nobody had waited so long to see it, and then he finally got distracted and it was a missed opportunity. Yeah.
0:30:50 – Speaker 2
I think it’s important for people to understand that. I think there’s a lot of people in the world that feel that way you do yes.
0:30:57 – Speaker 1
The carrying the weight, yes.
0:30:59 – Speaker 3
Oh, hell yeah.
0:30:59 – Speaker 2
Specifically moms, really, oh my God, yes.
0:31:04 – Speaker 3
I know my wife is she definitely, oh, yeah.
0:31:07 – Speaker 1
She Carrying the weight of having to be on carrying the weight of the burden of. If this is not perfect enough, then it’s not good enough to put out there, it’s not good enough for people to consume.
0:31:19 – Speaker 3
Well, it’s less of a creative thing like that conundrum, it’s more of being the one that carries, like she does everything for the kids, making sure that their doctor’s appointments and their dentist’s appointments, and dealing with social security for my son and his special needs and all that kind of stuff, and then, not to mention doing her job and letting me play studio while she makes the real money in the family. Yeah, she feels that it’s not necessarily a creative thing, but it’s the same kind of weight on her shoulders, like if I take a break, it all comes crashing down and I can’t take a break.
0:32:01 – Speaker 1
I know many moms who feel like that. The fact that you can just even acknowledge and say out loud that your wife is doing all of those things, scott, it means that you’re far ahead of what a lot of partners tend to be seeing. Yeah, a lot of the women that I speak with about this type of topic is like my husband could not tell you eight of the things I’m doing over the course of the day and that, in addition to carrying that burden of that weight and knowing that it is something that we don’t often feel like we can let down, Just to give you a little example.
0:32:44 – Speaker 3
let’s see, we didn’t text each other all day today, and then, at 235, she sent me a heart and I responded how did you know I needed that?
0:32:54 – Speaker 2
She said I guess I just felt it.
0:32:58 – Speaker 3
And that’s the kind of connection that we have. She knew that because right before you guys got here, I was really like I went and picked up my daughter from school and brought her home and it’s just rainy and drizzly and blah and I’m just feeling like I get it. I may not feel exactly what you’re feeling, because I don’t know how you feel, but I know how I feel and, seeing the way you are right now, I identify with that feeling.
0:33:25 – Speaker 1
Thank you. That’s that’s I can tell you. For me, I am tired. I feel a sense of numbness. I am feel proud of the level of resilience I’ve shown this year. I feel angry that I’ve had to show it and we were talking today in the marketing meeting that it feels like I just need some sign. I need something that so perfectly clicks together that says everything that you’re doing right now and going through and feeling is just not for naught. I can’t just have it be for naught. You’re such an idiot.
0:34:14 – Speaker 3
What are you? What are you picking up? She’s lifting up.
0:34:16 – Speaker 1
The she’s lifting up the hope mermaid part as it reaches for the star. Yes, there’s my sign.
0:34:23 – Speaker 3
You’re absolutely right. Well, we’re at it.
0:34:25 – Speaker 1
Let me pick my affirmation card and see if we can double down on this ridiculousness.
0:34:32 – Speaker 2
Are we clear? Maybe you shouldn’t be doing it. Yeah, why don’t you do it?
0:34:35 – Speaker 1
You tell me no, I need to do it. Oh, okay, okay, that’s this one. I am just getting started. I know that each breath confirms that I’m alive and far from finished. I’m out. I’m out of my far from finished. We got that one before. By the way, I do not understand how, in this entire deck of cards, I’ve now doubled up on two cards.
0:35:01 – Speaker 3
Can you get rid of some of the cards after you use them twice?
0:35:04 – Speaker 2
We’re going to have to. I cannot, I cannot with the two of you. This is the point. Clearly you’re not getting it. So it’s constantly has to come back, to be reinforced, reinforced, reinforced. I’m all done, I’m all done trying to show you the way in every way possible.
0:35:21 – Speaker 1
Yep, because last time I got this card with the I am just getting started. I know that each breath confirms that I am alive and far from finished. My response was I’m closer to not being done than you are, because you’re so old. That was my joke, right? Well, it’s a joke of me. That’s the problem.
0:35:36 – Speaker 2
Now I need it again.
0:35:37 – Speaker 3
Did you?
0:35:38 – Speaker 2
really get it this time? Is it really coming along around to you so next? So basically, when we go to New York City we’re going to go see one of those readers that when you drink the coffee and then they drink the bottom of the cup, maybe you’ll fricking get it then I think it’s tea leaves, whatever the fricking is I don’t know.
0:35:54 – Speaker 1
I think it’s coffee. Whatever, I’m not thinking they’re like you got any grounds left in there. Yeah, it’s like Turkish coffee with like a weird.
0:35:59 – Speaker 2
yeah, oh I love Turkish coffee. Yeah, they read the grounds. They do, and I’m bet you it’s. I’m just gonna bring these cards with me and see if it matches up.
0:36:07 – Speaker 1
Yeah, the only thing I can think about right now is those places in New York City where you sit on the chair and you stick your feet in the fish, thing, fish thing and they eat the gunk off the bottom of your feet.
0:36:17 – Speaker 2
That would make you real happy. That’s how my day is going.
0:36:22 – Speaker 1
I am the fish Just eating the gunk off everybody’s feet, yep, yep, yeah.
0:36:29 – Speaker 2
So it’s really interesting.
You’re also not used to being down? Yeah, and you’re not used to, because you’re so calculated, you’re so on top of your game, you’re so prepared and manage your emotions really clearly. You are a journaling type of person, you are a reflective type of person. My favorite, my favorite things you say that I just realized is when you call me and you’re telling me your stories and the way that you do, and then, without a doubt, when there it’s like the climax of the story and you always say so and so is in my head and this is what happened, and you like play those things and I’m like that’s hilarious because I can see it all going down.
0:37:18 – Speaker 1
Like I play health a scenario. Yes, it’s happening. Yes.
0:37:22 – Speaker 2
But I can see you actually reflecting on things that people have said to you or have pointed out or whatever.
0:37:27 – Speaker 1
And then because you truly think deep and evaluate and all those things, which has created an interesting phenomenon, which might be part of what I’m experiencing right now. I have convinced myself that as long as you put in this particular amount of effort, as long as you put in this particular concoction of ingredients, that you are for sure going to get out this result.
0:37:56 – Speaker 3
Oh, that’s not true that there’s a small amount of risk that there’s.
0:38:01 – Speaker 1
You know, from a calculated standpoint, as a calculated person, this has been reinforced constantly throughout my life that as I continue to do these things, I can anticipate the outcome, and very rarely is the outcome anything other than what I expected it to be. The problem with that is when the outcome after I’ve put in the ingredients is not what I expected to be. It really confuses me. I start to feel like maybe I’ve missed a step right, Maybe I missed an ingredient, Maybe I’ve done something incorrectly, Maybe I just need to fine tune this one little thing and then the outcome is going to happen. I treat even the relationships in my life like this formulaic thing that has an outcome that I anticipate.
And I’ll use Renee as an example, because she says all the time you’re experiencing in these last few weeks what I experience every single day in my life. She’s like I am so used to things not going well, I’m so used to things going wrong. And I use the example with her of how she went to the gym every single day when we were in college. Every single day I saw what she ate. She was putting all the time, effort and energy into what she needed to do Guarantee. That girl lost two pounds and she’s like. I’m just so used to the fact that when you put the time, effort and energy in, it does not always equal the outcome.
0:39:31 – Speaker 2
This is for the yield, the result you were anticipating. Yes, Based on the information you have learned Absolutely Science Right.
0:39:39 – Speaker 1
It’s the science, it’s the experience, it’s the anticipation of what that’s supposed to be, it’s your past experience this is rare for me and then in 2023, you add to the fact that now the ingredients that I’m putting in have led to conclusions, more often than I’ve ever been experiencing in my entire life, that have not led to the conclusions that I thought that they were going to, and then that’s really what’s impacting my psyche.
0:40:07 – Speaker 2
Well, especially because it’s every single one, there hasn’t been a lot of. Yes, because of how often it’s happening.
0:40:15 – Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah.
0:40:17 – Speaker 2
And if that’s just you like I don’t want you to think it’s just you. When we sit down with individual peoples in our lives, it’s happening across the board.
0:40:25 – Speaker 1
Yes, yeah, I’m not used to that. And when, even if you are used to it, if I keep using the metaphor of the wave just keeps crashing me down and I stand back up and I’m like I got this, boom, another wave comes in. Right, and yes, the positive reframe is I’m learning a lot about resiliency, I’m learning a lot about myself. I’m learning a lot about all this stuff, right, but it wasn’t until the other day when you and I were on the phone. Well, renee was there as well and you said I just can’t help but think that as you come to this point of clarity, the universe starts to shift around you to put the things that need to be in your path there. Now, I am not hippie, voodoo, shit girl. Okay, I swear to God, if you hold up that card one more time.
I just threw the quote, cannot? I wish I had some french fries to eat right now, right into the microphone.
0:41:24 – Speaker 2
You took my pendulum, otherwise I’d be asking a question.
0:41:27 – Speaker 1
What do you want to know? I got it.
0:41:31 – Speaker 2
It’s the universe telling her and everything she needs to know about how to move forward.
0:41:38 – Speaker 1
Look at it Back and forth. I know Happiest can be. Look at this thing, look it’s going, it’s really going.
0:41:44 – Speaker 2
But the problem is, none of it makes sense to you because it’s not in that scientific formula that you have either learned or put together based on data or other people who have been successful or whatever. It’s not. It’s that idea of you ever see that meme. That’s like progress, you think, looks like this and it starts down at the bottom and goes straight up, but it’s like a windy, crazy thing.
0:42:10 – Speaker 3
That’s where you are right now.
0:42:11 – Speaker 2
You’re in the middle of the goddamn spiral. I know, I know, and you are not used to being there, which is also the reason why we’re friends, because I’m all very used to being there. So I’m very used to being like yeah, take my hand, we’re going to go for a little ride. It’s like that toilet thing, that toilet water slide thing.
0:42:29 – Speaker 1
Yeah, we’re going right down the toilet.
0:42:31 – Speaker 2
Right down, right down.
0:42:32 – Speaker 1
I like the one that’s just straight from the top Of course you do.
0:42:34 – Speaker 3
You know exactly what I’m going to get.
0:42:36 – Speaker 1
Put me actually put me in that little hole that comes right down, so I make sure I’m not going to fly out randomly.
0:42:42 – Speaker 2
This is the most uncomfortable For you. Being in these positions is equivalent for me talking to the weirdo in the target bathroom. That’s as uncomfortable as I could possibly get. That’s where you are.
0:42:54 – Speaker 1
Really. I don’t like it.
0:42:58 – Speaker 2
Welcome to my world.
0:42:59 – Speaker 1
I don’t like it, the weird shit you do I don’t like it at all.
0:43:03 – Speaker 2
It feels terrible, right, it feels like you just want to be like. This is so uncomfortable, and it’s not even about the answer. You can do hard things. You can do and accept hard things. The problem is, there is no Perfect solution. There is no perfect answer. There is no. You like definitive? Yes, you like plans. We don’t deviate from the plans unless we’re driving down the highway and we see a antique store. That’s correct.
0:43:37 – Speaker 3
We can 100% deviate from that plan.
0:43:40 – Speaker 2
By the way.
0:43:40 – Speaker 3
I took Sawyer to. This is funny.
0:43:42 – Speaker 2
I took her to the Liberty Hollow yesterday and we walk in and she immediately walks straight to the back from the front and I had a reaction no, you did.
0:43:55 – Speaker 1
I had a reaction. I go have you been here before.
0:44:01 – Speaker 2
She’s like no, this is great. I said there’s a way to do this. And she looks at me and she goes what do you mean? I go, we must walk this way so we don’t forget anything. And she goes well, eventually get to it. And she took off.
0:44:11 – Speaker 1
Nope, you didn’t feel good, did you?
0:44:14 – Speaker 2
I have?
0:44:14 – Speaker 1
experienced me. Yes, see, not only did you experience you, but you also are having your channeling me. I know, and you are so conditioned at this point that that’s the way you walk, yep, and she’s never going again with me.
0:44:28 – Speaker 2
Nope, nope, we’re all done with that. Did you get my ornament? Yeah, I went to get it and it was $25. And I made the decision not to buy it. Wow, did you want to spend $25?
0:44:40 – Speaker 1
I’m hearing a theme, what I’m hearing, a theme that you’re broke. I own Concern Center. I ask you to do some things. You put it on the list. You decide you’re not going to do it Because I decided I own a course.
You don’t ask me I didn’t have my phone. You could change right the course. I didn’t have my phone. Then I say, could you please go to the shops and could you get me this ornament? And you’re like, absolutely, I’m going to be out there on the 26th. I said great, Now I’ve been out there a couple of times and I haven’t gotten it because I didn’t want to thwart your. You would have to walk around the whole place and whatever.
0:45:10 – Speaker 2
Okay, I didn’t know exactly where it was but, I didn’t look at the price when I sent you that picture. Did we ever talk about price? No, but I made a decision that that’s too much money. I see that. I see that I’m also in charge of the budget. Okay, in your life.
0:45:24 – Speaker 3
Now Okay, who are?
0:45:25 – Speaker 2
you Okay, yeah, that’s good Just like you had a an event we’re going to on Wednesday and I pulled that trigger to we’re not doing that.
0:45:31 – Speaker 1
I didn’t know that either.
0:45:32 – Speaker 2
Right. People are going to want to know what that is, and we cannot talk about it, it’s got, you can know after the show. One more Amazon store.
0:45:44 – Speaker 1
Yeah One. Yeah, hit us with an Amazon, because we’re not doing an empathy problem today, because I have a massive empathy problem, I know.
0:45:50 – Speaker 2
So my latest Amazon returns I purchased a device that helps women with incontinence and it is a rubber Rectum. No, it’s not in your rectum, it goes in your, your Ratha or your vagina. So, anyway, it’s this rubber looking thing that looks like a topsy tail, remember those? Yeah, but it’s like doubled. But then the middle part sticks up a little. So the idea is, when you stick it up your vagina, it pushes on your bladder, so that when you sneeze or laugh or whatever, you don’t push your pants.
0:46:24 – Speaker 1
Okay, because we do have a problem with this. Yes, and by we I mean Rebecca, that’s right.
0:46:29 – Speaker 2
Big time. Yeah, so I purchased this and I’m all excited about it because I had a great reviews. I purchased it. I open it. It’s the. It’s a reusable topsy-torvy looking thing and it comes with 30 strings and the idea is you’re supposed to purchase for $30 a month the strings over and over A string. Right, and I’m thinking that’s a dumb.
0:46:51 – Speaker 1
you can use some stuff you know, like that used to make friendship bracelets with that that’s good, yeah, so yeah, no, but the friendship bracelets, you know like, the like, the yarn.
0:47:04 – Speaker 2
What do you call that? Twine, not twine. That would hurt. Twine, not twine. You know what I’m talking about.
0:47:12 – Speaker 1
Rub, rub, rub.
0:47:14 – Speaker 2
So I get this thing and I am reading the directions while the toilet in. My Taylor comes home and she’s like mom, why are you doing work on the toilet? I’m not. I’m reading the directions for how to how to use this thing. So I it comes with like a popsicle stick looking applicator, so you shove it in there.
0:47:33 – Speaker 1
I know what do you mean.
0:47:35 – Speaker 2
You shove. You shove it in like a tampon because it’s reusable. So you shove this topsy-torvy looking thing down into the applicator, which then expands, and then you insert it. That way you don’t use your hands. So I, I do this thing and I insert it and I think, okay, it feels fine. And I wore it for the entire day and still had my incontinence problem. I promptly took it out, washed it, put it back in the packaging and returned to Amazon. They accepted my return just today and I got my body back.
0:48:12 – Speaker 3
So what.
0:48:16 – Speaker 2
I have done it all. You took it out. I washed it with my dial disinfectant soap from my tattoo. Thank you.
0:48:23 – Speaker 1
Thank you for and.
0:48:24 – Speaker 2
I let it air dry.
0:48:26 – Speaker 1
I really is going to help the next person, why don’t they just tell you to throw it out? I don’t think we’re reusing those. I don’t think we’re packaging that back up Well, I.
0:48:36 – Speaker 2
I assumed. I assumed they wouldn’t take it back because the seal was broken, you know like, yeah, you know, but they did.
0:48:43 – Speaker 1
Okay. So, we’re going to put that on the shit we don’t love page because no one needs to be buying it.
0:48:50 – Speaker 3
Because what?
0:48:50 – Speaker 1
you’re buying is Rebecca’s old, used, incontinent tub. That’s disgusting. I know that is next level. So now, between your thongs and your incontinence bubble insertion, we really have covered all of the Amazon. Let’s just know that.
0:49:12 – Speaker 2
Amazon takes everything back.
0:49:14 – Speaker 1
Good, that’s, that’s really good. Good to know, right, scott. Good to know, yeah, yeah, you still over there.
0:49:22 – Speaker 3
Yeah, I’m here.
0:49:25 – Speaker 2
Yeah, so you know if you need any returns. Done, you got a 30 day window. Yep, I assumed that they were going to say no ineligible for returns. They were supposed to. They didn’t just so or or thanks, but throw it away. Right, we’ll give you your money back.
0:49:40 – Speaker 1
Nope, I’ve had makeup before that they’re like. Thanks for returning it. Here’s your money back. Give it to a friend, right, right.
0:49:46 – Speaker 2
I mean, I don’t need that.
0:49:47 – Speaker 1
I donated here you go yeah, yeah, put it in the good will pile.
0:49:53 – Speaker 2
That’s what they need? No, but they took it back.
0:49:55 – Speaker 1
Good, that’s good. If anyone wants Rebecca’s old incontinence bubble, go ahead and purchase it right off the Amazon. Yeah yeah.
0:50:07 – Speaker 2
I loved that Me too. Isn’t empathy amazing? Well, we’re amazing. I don’t know about all this empathy stuff, that’s fine, I accept you wherever you are.
0:50:19 – Speaker 1
Oh God, I love you. I love you too, and if you love us, please like and subscribe to more love the power of empathy podcast, wherever you get your podcasts. See you next time.

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